Sleazy on the eyes
It’s about time Amazon got into the softcore-porn biz.
That’s really all “The Voyeurs,” the streamer’s new movie, is: gussied-up smut.
Writerdirector Michael Mohan’s “drama” tries to be a modern “Rear Window” (emphasis on “rear”), but Hitchcock it ain’t. “The Voyeurs” is a cheap, never-ending trifle that takes itself more seriously than “Hamlet.”
We meet Pippa (Sydney Sweeney) and Thomas (Justice Smith), a bland millennial couple, as they move into a spectacular Montreal apartment they could absolutely never afford in real life.
Then, instead of being well-behaved Canadians who eat poutine and say “Sorry” a lot, they decide to spy on the couple across the street having sex.
At first they’re titillated, but the peek soon turns into a dangerous infatuation. The doe-eyed duo start using binoculars to get a close-up view, and they rig a high-tech listening device to hear what their hot, nympho neighbors are saying behind closed doors. Becoming pervs, surprise surprise, spices up Pip and Tom’s sex life.
They eventually meet sexy Seb (Ben Hardy) and Julia (Natasha Liu Bordizzo) when they crash their Halloween party-cum-orgy. The masquerade scene is like “Eyes Wide Shut,” but Stanley Kubrick would’ve sooner directed an episode of “Blue’s Clues” than this dreck.
The ending, and the eleventh-hour twists (death, more sex), are preposterous and mind-numbingly stupid.
It’s a mystery how Mohan snapped up Smith, the rising star of “Detective Pikachu” and HBO’s “Genera+ion,” to appear in a Cinemax castoff. Charming and versatile, he is much better than the hack job he’s trapped in.
All that said, if you’re in the market for gratuitous nudity, Amazon has got you covered.
Running time: 120 minutes. Rated R (strong sexual content, nudity that’s briefly graphic, language, some disturbing images). On Amazon Prime Video.