Bernie 'cranks' it up
Manchin, Sinema aren’t the crazy ones
ON this week’s episode of “Curb Your Capitalism,” the Burlington Bolshevik Bernie Sanders sounded more like Larry David than ever. Just as Larry can hardly drive down the street or walk into a dentist’s office without making people’s hate meters start buzzing, Bernie is getting rantier, more curmudgeonly and less of a team player every day.
Senator Socialist has always been the screaming old geezer at the next table in the deli going, “Miss, MISS, I said rye bread NOT PUMPERNICKEL, and my root beer is WARM!” He no longer makes the slightest pretense of being a collegial member of the world’s most august clubhouse; this week he proved he should not be in contact with anyone who isn’t paid to humor him.
Among Sanders’ latest batty moves, it’s hard to choose the most hilarious self-own. How about when he said, “Two people do not have the right to sabotage what 48 people want!!”
Yeah, but how about 52 senators, Bernie? ’Cause that’s how many of your colleagues are now refusing
to go full socialist and pass a spending plan designed to turn us into ABBA-era Sweden.
This isn’t just about Kyrsten Sinema and Joe Manchin. This is about Sinema, Manchin and 50 other senators hesitating about a gargantuan new spending scheme that no one asked for last year, when all anyone wanted was a solution to COVID and a break from Donald Trump’s tweets. Instead of nutty insults about Joe Scarborough and Little Rocket Man, we got a nuttier plan to spend $3.5 trillion by the narrowest possible margin using the skeeviest possible trick (budget reconciliation), at a moment when the president’s approval ratings are underwater on every single measure.
Here’s a big difference between the Trump Era and the Biden Era: Not one of Trump’s tweets ever cost us $3.5 trillion, which is larger than the GDP of Great Britain — the fifth largest on the planet.
After a disgusting violation of Sen. Sinema’s privacy by rabid protesters who chased her into a ladies’ room and filmed her while doing so, Sanders refused to sign a joint statement condemning that outrageous behavior unless the statement also took a shot at Sinema herself, for not backing the reconciliation boondoggle. There is no pleasing the man, ever. “Miss? MISS! I like the pastrami, but my coleslaw’s a little OFF. Is this FRESHLY MADE or did you get it from a CAN?”
As for Manchin, the other Democratic senator who is asking whether we need colossal new spending programs when the federal government is already running up a $3 trillion deficit — triple what it was in 2019 — Sanders said, “I can’t speak for Mr. Manchin. I’m not a psychologist.”
So: Socialist Santa wants spending that will increase government debt by 8.9 percent by 2050, and Manchin is the crazy one?
“Miss? MISS? I want a KNOCKWURST, that mustard I like that isn’t too SPICY because I got an ULCER, plus a side order of ECONOMIC RUINATION. And, MISS, I’m in a HURRY. I don’t wanna be LATE for my PODIATRIST.”