SELMA BLAIR’S ‘VAMPY’ DIARIES
She bites celebs, really
Selma Blair has quite the set of chompers.
The actress, 49, reveals in her new memoir, “Mean Baby: A Memoir of Growing Up,” that she sank her teeth into several celebs, the first one being Sienna Miller.
One night after her divorce from Ahmet Zappa in 2006, Blair writes that she was at the Chateau Marmont when she saw Miller and introduced herself. “I couldn‘t begrudge her for any part she was winning over me,” Blair writes. “So, I grabbed her arm and bit it, playfully, as if it were an apple. Even as I held her forearm in my mouth I was aghast at myself. I thought, What have I gotten myself into? Or her?
This is horrible behavior.”
Miller handled the odd situation politely. Blair shares that Miller “kind of screamed, ‘Opa!’ as I do whenever someone breaks a plate. ‘You bit me, didn’t you? You really did,’ ” but “she didn’t shame me. For this, in my book, she will forever be the belle of the ball.”
You’re next, ‘Family Guy’
The “Legally Blonde” star also sunk her teeth into Seth MacFarlane.
Blair also remembers becoming friendly with Scarlett Johansson while working on the 2004 film “In Good Company;” she was delighted when Johansson invited her to hang out with her and her pals in Las Vegas.
The first night the group went out for sushi, but Blair — who struggled with alcoholism for years — confesses that she “wasn’t good at social drinking. I did not realize how drunk one can get while seated at a table, eating.”
After dinner, they made their way to a club, where Blair saw her friend Seth Green, who introduced her to “Family Guy” creator MacFarlane. “I was starstruck,” she writes. “What do I do in public situations where I admire someone but feel as if I don’t bring anything to the party? I bit him on the hand. ‘Whoa!’ he yelled. ‘That really hurt.’ It wasn’t a disaster; I didn’t break skin. But I soon hated myself.”
Kate Moss, too?
But Blair’s chomping days weren’t over yet.
She became friendly with supermodel Kate Moss and one night was hanging with her and other people in a London hotel suite after a Marc Jacobs fashion show.
The two were having fun, taking Polaroids together — and that’s when Blair decided to bite Moss’ finger, prompting the model to laugh. “And because she laughed, I did it again,” she writes. “The second time, she did not laugh and exclaimed, ‘That really f--king hurt!’ Moss then punched Blair in the back and grabbed the actress’ thumb “and crunched right into it.”
“This was the first time I had any inkling of how much I might hurt people when I bit them,” Blair confessed. “Immediately, I transformed into a shamed nursery-school kid. ‘Oh, my gosh,’ I whispered, ‘I am so sorry.’ ”
Blair blames her vampiric behavior on her shyness. If she’s nervous, she writes, “my system gets overwhelmed and instantaneously short-circuits.”