Rodgers: Retreat gave ‘deep calm’ about NFL future

Aaron Rodgers did not leave his darkness retreat with a decision about his NFL future, but he has found a “deep calm” when it comes to figuring it out. Rodgers said he spent one of the four days contemplating his life in retirement and another contemplating what it would be like if he continues his NFL career.

“My life and my happiness is directly connected to how I feel about football and it gave me such a deep calm about how I feel about the decision,” Rodgers said on the “Aubrey Marcus Podcast.” “I finished those two days with deep love and admiration and blessings in a retired life of fulfilling all the needs that I have and spending time with the people that I love. And also going back and playing. Not playing out of spite or to prove something to someone or for the money but playing because I fell in love with this game when I was 6 years old. And I am happy with my guys and my people when I am out there.” Rodgers spent four days in a dark room in Oregon meditating, he said. The 39-year-old quarterback described the experience as “pretty incredible” and “difficult at times.”

Rodgers conceded that while he has not made a decision yet — the interview was done last week, 48 hours removed from the darkness experience — one is coming soon.

“Before there was a scary option [retirement] and one was unknown,” Rodgers said. “The unknown was going back and playing and what does that mean. Is that Green Bay or is that somewhere else? And if it is somewhere else, what is it like being somewhere else. Now it feels like there are two really beautiful options.”

Packers GM Brian Gutekunst said from the NFL Scouting Combine on Tuesday that the team has yet to have a meaningful discussion with Rodgers and that there needs to be a resolution on the quarterback’s future by the start of NFL free agency on March 15.

The Jets and Raiders are among the teams interested in acquiring Rodgers, if he and the Packers decide to split.

“If I decide to play, [the first thing] is a conversation with them,” Rodgers said of the Packers organization, where he has played his whole career. “‘Where are you guys at, honestly?’ I’ve been there 18 years and I have so much love for that organization.”

Rodgers acknowledged he was dealing with “insecurities and fear” as he pondered life in retirement.

“I really had to sit with those and go to the root of what those are and go back to childhood or college or early days of NFL and work through those moments,” Rodgers said. “After five, six hours of going through that I found a really nice sweetness and comfort with what I was sitting with that day and that was what retirement would look like and what would nourish my soul best. … Beautiful ending to that, but also a lot of difficult contemplations to that insecurity and fear about what happens when you turn the lights out on your career.”