Northwest Arkansas Democrat-Gazette
Couple chooses to love full time
For the Fort Smith nursing students, the monthly social was a chance to mingle. Although they were being closely monitored by the nuns, the young women were having fun. Young servicemen from nearby Fort Chaffee were having a great time, too. Many were transplants from other areas of the country, away from home for the first time and hoping for a touch of romance.
It was June of 1962, and Frances Harris sat at a table with her friends while the servicemen and students mingled. She was wasn’t expecting for love to dance into her life, she remembered. George Philip III was newly enlisted and probably not looking for anything serious. That was, until he met Frances.
They danced that night, and he asked her out. But their first date wouldn’t exactly go as planned.
“My mother had told me to keep in mind that he was a serviceman and probably didn’t have a lot of money,” Frances said. “And I wasn’t to expect a big meal. So when he took me out to dinner, all I had was tomato juice.”
“She was a cheap date,” George quipped.
After their less than perfect first dinner, the couple began seeing each other regularly. Under the watchful eye of a house mom and with a strict curfew, Frances would go on long walks with her beau, which gave the couple plenty of time to talk and get to know one another, they said.
“It wasn’t like it is now, when you have all these distractions like TV and games and phones,” George said. “We only had each other. It gave us a chance to really talk and learn about each other. It gave us a very close friendship for love to develop from.”
On Sept. 26, 1964, the couple wed in Fayetteville and moved into a small garage apartment in Oklahoma. Frances taught George how to drive, which she described as “interesting, but he took instruction well,” and George continued his career in the United States military.
After the birth of George IV in 1965, George was transferred to Hawaii. The couple remained in Hawaii for three years and welcomed sons Mike in 1966 and Martin in 1969. But as they settled down with their three young boys, an international struggle would disrupt their quiet lives.
George was deployed to Vietnam just after the birth of Martin. Although he was primarily outside the combat zone, George’s duties were still precarious and Frances never stopped worrying.
The couple coped
“It wasn’t like it is now, when you have all these distractions like TV and games and phones. We only had each other. It gave us a chance to really talk and learn about each other. It gave us a very close friendship for love to develop from.”
George Philip
through communication and religion. Just as they had early in their relationship, they spoke frequently, only this time through letters.
“I would get letters from home, and they were so precious,” George said. “That’s how I knew what was going on with her and the kids. We relied on those letters. And I would write letters to comfort her — reminding her that I still loved her, even if I couldn’t be with her. But it made us stronger. Sometimes you don’t know what you have until it’s taken away from you. It made me appreciate what I had when I got back.”
“And the good thing was that we had a good faith base, that we had church,” Frances said. “We had always been active in church, but this really drew me into the community. It’s been a major part of our successful marriage.”
After his return, the couple welcomed the birth of Carolyn in 1972 and made their final big move back home to Northwest Arkansas. In 1976, Samuel joined the family, followed by adopted daughter Angela in 1992.
But even with six children, the family was still incomplete. Through prayer and hours upon hours of talking, the couple chose to become foster parents, welcoming six very young siblings into their home.
“While I was working, she was staying home with the kids and the younger ones more recently, which I know wasn’t an easy job,” George said. “I think it was a much harder job for her than what I was doing. I really respect what she was doing.”
“It was a struggle, but if there was a diaper to be changed, he was right there,” she said. “Everything was a partnership. We didn’t rely on gender roles — women’s work or men’s work — it was family work.”
Through hard work, determination and communication, the couple has made 50 years of marriage a time they wish they could repeat, they said. And although they feel they have been very blessed, their struggles have drawn them together because of a commitment to working together.
“The important thing to the marriage even in the beginning was that we made a commitment not to fall in love, but to choose to love,” said Frances. “We made this commitment, and we chose to stay together and work for it through our lives.”
“What we had was a faith base to build the commitment onto,” George added. “And I was raised learning to work. And it transferred into our lives together. That’s how we taught our children and is a major reason why we have worked so well together. Love is funny. Love is great. You’ve just got to be serious about the commitment.
“It’s not a part-time thing.”