Wife left at home with the kids longs to socialize with adults

Dear Abby: My husband, Tom, and I have three kids: One is in college, the next is in grade school and the youngest is a baby. I’m a fulltime medical student, and he’s a professional athlete.

From the outside, it would seem like we have a perfect life. In reality, Tom does his own thing. He attends parties, goes to social events and hobnobs with the rich and famous. I am left to manage all of our day-to-day responsibilities and socially restricted to family functions or kid sports.

I would like to be included in the invitations and attend some of the fun activities, but when I ask him if I can go, he says they are “work-related.” I’d really like the chance to interact with other adults with my husband, but I can’t seem to get him to appreciate

the importance of including me. If I make a big deal about it, he opts not to attend the event. I’m slightly suspicious of his behavior and offended. How can I get him to understand it’s important for both of us to have fun together with other adults? — Sports Wife

Dear Sports Wife: A wife is supposed to be more than a baby machine, housekeeper and nanny. She’s supposed to be her husband’s partner. While I understand there may be some events the athletes attend without spouses, it would be interesting to know whether the other athletes’ wives are being treated the way you are. Surely you know some of them. Talk to the ones you are closest with. Your husband may not have been entirely honest, so make it your business to do some checking.

Dear Abby: I’m the proud grandmother of an 18-monthold girl. My daughter is an attentive mother in every way except one. My concern is that she lets the baby play alone in the bathtub.

My husband and I recently celebrated my birthday at her house. When I asked where the baby was, another guest said, “She’s playing in the bathtub.” Sure enough, the baby was in the bathroom, in the bathtub, playing and swimming around in the water by herself. I was horrified!

I spent the next day in a panic, sending my daughter stories, s and other information, about how dangerous this is, but she didn’t want to hear it. Do you have some magic words for me? — Grandmother Dear Grandmother: Babies have been known to drown in as little as 2 inches of water. Your clueless daughter may not want to hear it, but what you have described is child endangerment. The magic words you are asking for are: “parenting classes.” And if she still won’t listen, some other good ones are: “Child Protective Services.”