Mom is rattled to learn son has started cross-dressing

Dear Abby: My son’s girlfriend confided to me that my son, age 35, is cross-dressing. I knew his life was in flux and that his appearance had changed, but it stunned me. He hasn’t mentioned anything, and she said he would be very upset if I knew.

When I saw him the same day, I made sure to hug him and tell him I love him. Please tell me what to do or say. — What To Say

Dear What: Do nothing, say nothing. This isn’t your business, and the girlfriend was wrong to betray your son’s confidence.

It may reassure you to know that cross-dressing has been around for centuries and has been present in many cultures. Most male cross-dressers are heterosexual and do it because it feels good to them. It is no reflection on their morals, their sexual orientation or gender identity.

Dear Abby: I have a 6-year-old son, “Tyler,” from a previous relationship. I have been seeing “Chad” for almost four years.

Chad can’t seem to have any kind of relationship or interaction with Tyler. He isn’t abusive, but he ignores my boy. I thought after all this time Chad would be used to my son, but it hasn’t happened.

I’m not sure if I should end the relationship. Any advice would be helpful. — Losing Hope

Dear Losing Hope: Your first responsibility is to your son. The way Chad treats Tyler will eventually damage the boy’s self-esteem if it hasn’t already. Children are perceptive. When they are ignored, they know something is wrong and think it’s their fault — that there’s something wrong with them and that they don’t measure up. My advice is to tell Chad the romance is over and why. Frankly, you should have done it years ago.

Dear Abby: I’m a loud snorer. I was on a plane recently, flying home after an exhausting trip. I fell asleep and my seatmate repeatedly woke me to complain about my snoring. Shouldn’t the woman have let me sleep in peace if she saw that I was genuinely tired? What made her needs greater than mine? — Trying To Sleep Dear Trying To Sleep: Not knowing the woman, it’s hard to say. Perhaps your seatmate felt entitled to a quiet flight and your snoring was so disruptive that, even with earphones, she could concentrate on nothing else.

P.S. I would be remiss if I didn’t urge you to discuss your snoring with your doctor. It could be a symptom of sleep apnea, a condition that is very serious.