Is it made up or real?

President Donald (Never a Dull Moment) Trump’s Bad Hair Comedy Tour continued last weekend. Let’s get straight to the highlights, shall we. (It is said you can’t make this stuff up, but maybe you can just a little bit.)

While touring an area in California devastated by wildfires, Trump stated that we wouldn’t have all these fires if we just kept the forest floors raked. White House sources would not comment on rumors that the administration is looking into installing underground sprinkler systems in all national forests. Trump reportedly stated, “I’ve got sprinkler systems at all my fabulous golf courses, and not once has a fairway caught fire.”

While tweeting with his stubby little fingers, Trump misspelled Congressman Adam Schiff’s last name, turning it into a vulgar word that he most likely learned while serving his country as a 13-year-old cadet at New York Military Academy. Responding to the many critics who chided him for being sophomoric, Trump reportedly bragged that he was so smart he skipped that year at the academy.

Responding during an interview on Fox News to criticism directed at him by retired Admiral William McRaven, the flag officer responsible for the raid that killed Osama Bin Laden, Trump labeled McRaven a “Hillary Clinton fan” and an “Obama backer,” and stated that it would have been nice if we had caught Bin Laden sooner. When Chris Wallace reminded Trump that McRaven was a Navy SEAL, Trump reportedly replied, “So what? If he was any good, he would be a shark, like me.” Rumors are that Fox News deleted this comment from the interview that was aired, with insiders saying that Wallace was laughing so hard Trump threatened to fire Fox News and start his own network.

The laughs just keep coming. THOMAS MAY North Little Rock