Impressive PR

Just in time to boost ticket sales

SOMETIMES it’s better to be lucky than good. Remember that awful B-movie by Jane Fonda back in 1979 called The China Syndrome? What a

crock.

But in what can only be called a miracle of timing that would make any public relations executive blush, 12 days after that movie hit theaters, things went kaplooey at

Three Mile Island in

Dauphin County, Pa.

Next thing you know, Jack Lemmon is getting a best actor award at Cannes.

It’s happening again. In a more important and believable movie.

You might be familiar with an animated movie called Missing Link. It’s a little story about a Bigfoot who wants to be reunited with his distant cousins—the Yetis—because he’s lonely. You can ask our esteemed film critics at the paper what they think about the film for a complete recap and review.

We don’t do movie criticism in this space. We deal in reality.

The aforementioned movie, up against Marvel, didn’t makes tons of money this past weekend.

And might not ever. The film has been out for a few weeks, and we wouldn’t be surprised if some theaters remove it soon to make space for more Avengers stuff. But wait, there’s more. And, as the hero always arrives in the movies, just in the nick of time!

India’s (huge) army, which doesn’t have a sense of humor that it’s aware of, has found tracks.

Bigfoot tracks. In Yeti country. From

The Washington Post, and we’re not kidding about the news source:

“The army tweeted from its official account Monday that an expedition team

had come across Mysterious Footprints of mythical beast ‘yeti’ measuring 32 inches by 15 inches close to Makalu Base Camp on 09 April 2019.’ The post included several photos.” Missing Link debuted on April 12. It’s another PR miracle! Maybe the publicity will be enough for the flick to break even.

For a documentary on real Bigfoots, you need to get closer to Arkansas and The Legend of

Boggy Creek. Everybody knows the real 8-foot-tall, hairy, odoriferous, vaguely humanoid creature who hollers all night and leaves behind inch-deep impressions on the hardest ground lives just outside Fouke. Nobody really believes in Yetis in the mountain ranges of India, but B. Foot is often documented in the darker regions outside Texarkana.

On the Arkansas side.

Don’t give us those usual excuses about never having found one dead, or the lack of video evidence. We understand some of the “reality” shows on cable TV have the finest equipment and tracking devices, along with thermal imaging and sound equipment, and lots of cameras.

But from what we can tell, they’re wasting their time in the Great Pacific Northwest.

And all those experts who can tell the difference between the wind blowing in the trees and heavy breathing from a sasquatch on the next ridgeline, and who, we’re told, can distinguish a car horn on the interstate and a squatch who’s stumped his toe, need to go to Miller County, Ark., and set up shop. The folks there can tell you where to point the cameras.

But Yetis in India? Save it for the kids, and the animated movies.