Ex-royals’ talk with Oprah eye-opening

New levels, new devils.

— Common church saying, YouTube sermon subject, song subject, clothing brand name

OK, you nice guys who happen to be girlfriend- or wife-seeking average Joes: Take heart.

I’m hailing you overlooked eggheads and bean counters who toil away obscurely in low-ceilinged basement-level government offices in short-sleeve shirts with ties.

Matter of fact, I’m talking to you young men who didn’t go to college/grad school/law school/ medical school and therefore, don’t have initials after your name. I’m talking to you fellows who wash cars (or sell them). You guys who buff floors, drive Ubers, deliver for Grubhub or serve coffee for a living. You dear ones who do your jobs in dirty jumpsuits, shirts bearing embroidered tags with your name on them, or one of those distinctive blue smocks. I’m even talking to you guys who live in your mom’s basements.

When you find yourself on the verge of being rejected by that desirable young woman who believes (and probably had it drummed into her by her family) that she needs to marry a guy who can give her the world, you now have the perfect thing to say.

“Oh, you want a prince, huh? Well look at how that worked out for Meghan Markle.”

The best part of the American-born Duchess of Sussex’s 2018 marriage to Britain’s Prince Harry seems to have been the wedding … along with the genuine love they appear to have for each other and their determination to forge a life together. Everything else looks to have been sheer hell. (Hence, the saying at the beginning of this column: when you go to new, higher levels, you have to be prepared to face the higher-level devils prepared to attack you.)

Since she married Prince Harry, Meghan has been accused of everything except unleashing the covid-19 variant itself. The Meghan haters, led by the British tabloids, worked overtime. The Sussexes’ act of quitting their royal duties and moving to Canada, then the United States, birthed the term “Megxit,” ushering in yet more resentment of Meghan and brutal criticism of her. Most recently, Meghan was hit by accusations of bullying her staff while in Jolly Old England; the Palace responded that an investigation would be taking place. Said accusations hastened to come out before the broadcast of Meghan and Harry’s interview with Oprah, the multi-bombshell March 7 interview during which Meghan and Harry told of being caught between the Tower of London and the deep

blue Atlantic.

During the interview, the couple, now expecting a daughter, told their side of the story/stories and debunked the tabloid headlines. Just some of what emerged: A senior royal brought up to Harry the subject, prior to son Archie’s birth, of how the color of Archie’s skin might turn out, seeing that his wife was biracial. Meghan told of a lack of protection from the Palace, protection afforded other royals; of totally losing her freedom (even access to personal effects); of being advised not to even go out and see her friends; of how things got so bad, she went through a period of “not wanting to be alive anymore” — and was denied mental-health aid. The couple talked about their security being removed in Canada, where they’d still intended to work for the Crown. Harry told of how they’d been cut off, period — without a farthing — but were able to exist on money left to Harry by Princess Diana, who her son believes saw this mess coming.

As reported by various news outlets afterward, the common denominator that kept coming up during the interview was racism … much of which, in those tabloid headlines/stories, was blatant. But we know that even per Harry’s own mother, Princess Diana, “the cake wasn’t all dough” — to use a phrase I got from my dear mother, gone 24 years as of today (and who herself had high hopes as to the type of fellow I’d marry). Diana got a prince, but her marriage was no happily-after-after affair. (To Oprah, Harry told of seeing “history repeating itself” in reference to the tough row his mother had to hoe as a royal, but opined that the repeat was “far more dangerous” because race was a factor.)

Here’s hoping and praying the Sussexes, unlike Harry’s parents, stay together. I don’t even want to think of the headlines, not to mention the gloating by the haters. If the unthinkable does happen, you fellows I addressed at the beginning of this column will (sadly) have that much more compelling an argument when going after the young ladies who were groomed to marry the man who has everything.

And I hope any young ladies who find themselves affianced to princes, literal or figurative, realize their unions may well come with costs that must be carefully counted … and make sure that the love is real.