Northwest Arkansas Democrat-Gazette

Man uses wife’s infidelity to forge an online persona

- ABIGAIL VAN BUREN Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother,Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069 or visit www.DearAbby.com

Dear Abby: I ended my 24-year marriage after learning my wife, in addition to several one-night stands, had an affair with a married couple for nine years. She also gave me an STI. I was faithful, though I admit to being difficult to live with.

We were unable to agree on parenting, finances, health, fitness, diet, religion, politics and more. I worked hard, but I was a present and active father, attending all games, concerts and activities, as well as coaching and teaching my children in music and the arts.

In the pursuit of helping other men deal with the grief of infidelity, divorce and mental health, I began sharing my experience on a social media platform. My oldest child has now chosen to “write me off” and refuses to speak to me. I’m hurt, but I respect her decision. I will not silence my story, as it is a tool of empowermen­t for other men. Is there a way to build a relationsh­ip with this adult child? — Disappoint­ed Dad In The Midwest

Dear Dad: Your daughter may be embarrasse­d or angry because you are publicly labeling her mother as an adulteress. Once she matures and she is willing to concede that there are often two sides to every story, she may mend fences, but it won’t happen until she is ready, and you cannot force it.

Dear Abby: I have noticed so many obituaries omit where the person worked. A lot of people worked at the same places for many years. Coworkers and acquaintan­ces I’m sure would like to pay respects to those who have passed. Too often, by the time they find out, the person has been laid to rest.

My late wife was a nurse for almost 40 years and came in contact with many people. The outpouring of love from family, friends and acquaintan­ces from her social and work lives was overwhelmi­ng and heartfelt. They say if we have memories of our loved ones touching others’ lives, they live on in our hearts forever.

People, please don’t let their memories fade. Let families know to include the work history of their loved one in the obituary, particular­ly if they had jobs dealing with the public. — Rememberin­g Well In Ohio

Dear Rememberin­g: Because the obituaries one reads in the newspaper are costly, it’s possible the writers try to keep them brief in order to save money. I am, however, printing your helpful reminder for those who may need it.

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