Northwest Arkansas Democrat-Gazette

Mother-in-law brings virus into pregnant woman’s home

- DEAR ABBY Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069 or visit www.DearAbby.com ABIGAIL VAN BUREN

Dear Abby: My husband and I are expecting our second child. Our first pregnancy ended in miscarriag­e, so we were overjoyed to find out I was pregnant again, this time with a little girl, “Mandy.”

Everything was going well until a month ago. My mother-in-law came over on her birthday for cake. I hadn’t seen her all weekend. Because our relationsh­ip isn’t great, I didn’t ask her why. Two days later she announced to my husband she had COVID and we should get tested. She’d spent the weekend running around, seeing people and going places. Then she came to over where I was 21 weeks pregnant and doing everything to keep this pregnancy.

I became violently ill for two weeks and, although I recovered, I spent three nights in the hospital because our baby is now suffering from my being sick. I am now on bed rest. We have no option other than getting through day by day to help buy Mandy more time inside to grow.

I am struggling with anger and resentment toward my MIL, but I’m trying to stay positive and avoid the toxicity so that Mandy has a fighting chance. When all this settles down, how do I even begin to address this with my MIL? —

Incensed In The East Dear Incensed: You are doing the right thing now by focusing on your little girl. How you deal with this in the future should be guided by this question: When your mother-in-law learned you were sick because she exposed you, did she apologize?

If she knew she “had a little something” and came over anyway, let that guide you and your husband in your interactio­ns with her in the future because her judgment is atrocious. If not, try to forgive her for this awful scare and let her build bridges if she’s capable of it.

Dear Abby: Four years ago, I found out my husband of 28 years had a fling with a co-worker. Right after it was exposed, the girl quit. I was devastated, but we made up.

During our reconcilia­tion, I learned that five or six years before the affair, my best friend, “Molly,” made some moves on my husband on an overnight work trip. (She is known to be a little loose.) She was the manager of a seasonal store, and they went to another store five hours away and stayed overnight.

I have ghosted Molly ever since. She was my best friend since childhood, and I felt it was the ultimate betrayal. As far as I’m concerned, she’s out of my life. She has recently sent me requests on Facebook. I know in time she will call again. I don’t want to talk to her, nor do I know what to say. — Burned In The South Dear Burned: Stop hiding. If Molly calls, tell her you know what she did with your husband, that you feel it was the ultimate betrayal and you do not want to hear from her again. Then end the call.

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