Man doesn't like woman — but he wants to cohabit

Dear Amy: I have been with my girlfriend for two years and we plan on moving in together in the next few months.

She has made it clear to me that she wants to get married and have children. I cannot imagine raising children with her, due to her inability to control her anger.

She defines herself as a person who feels emotions very strongly. On the contrary, I am more reserved with my emotions and how I share them.

As per her requests, I have been more forthcoming in expressing my emotions with her. Unfortunately, upon my request, she does not control her own emotions.

She can be very sweet and loving toward me, but then the slightest discomfort or disagreement can cause her mood to change instantly, bursting into tears or screams.

When she is in this volatile state, she unreasonably refuses compromise or discussion. My default is discussing the issue like adults, and her behavior puts me in no mood to comfort her. She wants me to hug and coddle her.

There are only so many times I can do this before feeling like it is a temporary fix for a deeper issue. Additionally, it doesn't prevent future fights, and makes me feel like I am parenting a child.

The worst part is that when I gently tell her that she needs to control her emotions she is defiant and makes excuses for herself. If I suggest that she should seek help if she is unable to control her emotions, she becomes agitated. Already our values differ on a number of subjects, but how can we reach any compromise when I am afraid of how she will react?

Dear Adult: I'm going to sidestep any attempt to diagnose your girlfriend, or even speculate about what her problem is, and turn directly to you. So, what's wrong with you?! You present yourself as the mature and appropriate adult, and so this begs the question: Why are you thinking of moving in with and forming a permanent attachment to someone you don't even like?

Normally when people complain about their partners, they try very hard to present something of a balanced picture of that person. You don't have one positive thing to say about your girlfriend. You obviously don't even like her.

I agree with you that you two shouldn't have children together. But you probably also shouldn't have coffee together.