Ask Amy: Sisters squabble over missed phone calls.

Dear Amy: I hope you can help solve a disagreement between my sister and me about phone call etiquette.

When my sister calls and I miss the call, she expects a quick callback, because I saw her missed call pop up on my phone.

I do not deliberately ignore her calls, but I don't have my phone glued to my hip. When I see a missed call but no voicemail or text, I assume that it is nothing important, or that she was just calling to shoot the breeze, and do not immediately call back.

She feels that I should always call her back when I see a missed call, because this is a simple courtesy.

I tell her to either leave me a voicemail or send a text to call her back, so that I know she has something specific to discuss.

Who is correct? Should I return every missed call from her, or should she send a quick message asking me to call her? We bicker constantly about this. I am hoping to get a resolution from you so we can lay this issue to rest. —Phone Tagged

Dear Tagged: My reaction to this is that, of the two of you, your sister is the one who wants something specific: a call back. You have told her how to get what she wants from you (by leaving a voicemail or sending a text). She is refusing to do this, and so she is not going to get what she wants.

I don't think this is an etiquette question, so much as an issue regarding human nature, as well as the strength of specific relationships. I happen to follow the same basic practice as you do -- if I see a missed call from someone I communicate with regularly, with no voicemail message or text, I return the call when (and if ) I want to.

You might compromise by shooting her a text saying, "What's up? Can I call you later?" when you see a "missed call" notification, but given your sister's overall demanding attitude regarding contact, I give you props for returning her calls at all.

Dear Amy: I loved your thoughtful response to "K" regarding how to heal from heartbreak -- except when you suggested that she "rethink" her use of antidepressants. I used an antidepressant for a short period when I was grieving, and it really helped me get through the worst of it. —Recovered

Dear Recovered: Many people have responded similarly.