Mike Bianchi: The Magic shouldn’t play (with) Lonzo Ball.
Running off at the typewriter ... Did you see where Lonzo
Ball reportedly was out of shape when he showed up for his recent workout with the Los Angeles Lakers, and there are rumblings the Lakers might pass on him in next week’s draft?
First of all, I think that would be absolutely hilarious. If the Lakers pass on Lonzo, obnoxious father LaVar Ball’s “Big Baller Brand” will immediately be relegated to “Deflated Baller Brand.” Secondly, if the Lakers pass on Ball, you wonder if he could conceivably slip far enough to where the Magic could take him with the No. 6 pick.
Let’s hope not. If I’m new Magic basketball boss Jeff
Weltman, I would run as fast as I could away from Ball; not
because of his dad but because of his desire — his desire to play in Los Angeles.
Orlando needs a player who wants to be here and will do everything in his power to make the Magic relevant again. What they don’t need is another Laker-loving Hollywood dreamer who thinks he’s too big for Orlando’s “dried up little pond.”
SHORT STUFF: It’s bad enough that Rick Pitino’s program was providing hookers to teenage recruits, but now Louisville’s administration and the college basketball media is prostituting itself for Pitino, too. Seriously, only college basketball publicists, er, analysts like Dick Vitale and Jay Bilas would believe that Louisville was running a brothel out of its basketball dorm for four years and yet Pitino — the renowned micro-managing coach — knew absolutely nothing about it. …
If Orlando City’s Cyle Larin were a Major League Baseball star instead of a Major League Soccer star, you better believe he would not have been immediately suspended for his recent DUI arrest and forced to enter his league’s Substance Abuse and Behavioral Health Program. There’s a simple reason why MLS has such a forceful policy in regard to substance abuse: Because the union for MLS players has no power to stop the league from doing whatever it wants to do. Always remember this mathematical formula: Weak player’s union = strong player discipline (see NFL). … Erin Hills, the course where they’re playing the U.S. Open, isn’t just playing easy; it’s more forgiving than the Tallahassee Police Department. …
The Miami Dolphins had one of their mini-camp practices interrupted earlier this week by a giant swarm of bees. And speaking of bees, that reminds me of my favorite sports talk radio host — Pollen Cowherd. … Lake Brantley High product Logan
Warmoth, the son of Channel 9 anchor Greg Warmoth, was taken in the first round of the Major League Baseball draft by the Toronto Blue Jays. News at 11. … Floyd Mayweather Jr. vs. Conor
McGregor isn’t the “Fight of the Century;” it’s the “Farce of the Century.” The only way something could be more overhyped would be if Danica married Linsanity. The last time America got this excited about nothing was when Geraldo Rivera opened Al
Capone’s vault. … Speaking of Danica, she dressed down a group of booing fans last week at Pocono by telling them, “When you boo me, you hurt my feelings.” Somewhere up in That Big Superspeedway in the Sky, Dale Earnhardt Sr. is simply shaking his head. Would love to see legendary FSU baseball coach
Mike Martin finally win the College World Series this year, but unfortunately we all know what the word “Omaha” means in Seminole Indian: “Two and
out.” … Breaking news: In response to the Golden State Warriors considering turning down a trip to the White House, President Trump is threatening to build a wall around Zaza Pachulia. … And why is it that every time I write the name Zaza Pachulia, I think of the late, great Zsa Zsa Gabor, who once said, “I’m a marvelous housekeeper — every time I leave a man, I keep his house.” … Just think, only 347 days until the Warriors-Cavs meet again in the NBA Finals.
LAST WORD: Can you believe LeBron James, after losing to the Warriors in the NBA Finals, actually said he’s never been on a super team. This is the most nonsensical statement since Iron Butterfly sang, “In-a-gadda-da-vida, honey, don't you know that I love you.”