SATURDAY CIRCUS
Amen, brutha!. …
Did you see where the president of a pro soccer team in Italy wants to put a strip club in the team’s new stadium? I’m assuming any patron who buys a lap dance in the club would have to abide by the rules of the beautiful game. If you use your hands, you get a red card and are booted from the stadium! … Which of these inferior sidekicks has less talent as compared to their corresponding headliner –
(Simon and Garfunkel), (Hall and Oates) or the NBA’s Eastern Conference? … Why is Cleveland Cavaliers owner being blasted for “lowballing” and only offering him $2 million a year to serve as the team’s new general manager? If you ask me, $2 million a year to pick up LeBron’s dry-cleaning and make his coffee is more than a fair salary. …
New York Mets GM has finally revealed that, yes, he signed for marketing purposes. In related news, doctors have revealed that your chances of death increase 100 percent after you’re born. … The Indiana Pacers have lost their superstar and are turning into the Orlando Magic right before our very eyes. Ugh, they even have as the new face of the franchise to prove it. … Actually, that’s the problem with today’s NBA: Too many franchises don’t have faces; they only have body parts. …
Three questions: (1) Who will Orlando City bring in during the transfer window? (2) Who will be the first free agent signed by the Orlando Magic’s new management team? (3) Who put the ram in the rama lama ding dong? … On the Fourth of July,
won his record 10th men’s title in the Nathan’s Famous Hot Dog Eating Contest by consuming 72 dogs and buns in 10 minutes. Somewhere up in That Big Media Buffet in the Sky,
was smiling with a mustard stain on his shirt. …