Mother struggles to deal with daughter’s tattoos.
Dear Amy: My 45-year-old daughter got a large tattoo on her inner arm. Imagine my surprise when I finally saw it. I said to her, "Is that real?" She laughed and said, "Yes." Nothing further was said during my visit except for once when I stated, "I don't like tattoos." That was three years ago. Now, she has sent me pictures of her with her dogs, husband, friends, etc., and I am seeing another tattoo. We are planning another visit. What do I say, if anything?
It's probably generational, but I can't stand to see my daughter with tattoos. — Tattoo Hater
Dear Hater: Sometimes I fall back on this: "If you can't find something nice to say, don't say anything at all."
For your daughter, these tattoos are not a defilement, but a decoration.And yes, your reaction is largely generational.
Before preparing any response, absorb this reality: your daughter is her own person.
You have choices regarding this relationship. You can choose to focus on something you see as a flaw and take it personally, or you can choose to love your daughter wholeheartedly.
Dear Amy: My normal routine is that my licensed childcare provider picks up my 5-year-old from school at 2:15 and cares for him until I finish work.
When she recently had a medical appointment, I agreed to pick him up and bring him to her, where her backup staff would care for him.
I forgot to pick up my own child! At about 4:20, I tore out of work and found him, safe and sound, at the after-school program at his school.
This got me thinking about the numerous deaths (450 babies and toddlers since 1998, 37 in 2016) that occur every summer because children are accidentally left in cars.
Very often, this occurs because of a variation in the parent's normal routine. That could have easily been me, and I have the greatest sympathy for the parents who have lost a child in such a tragic way. — Susan in Upstate NY
Dear Susan: Statistics of children dying of heat stroke in cars show that this tragedy is happening more often. As you point out, this can happen especially when there is a variation in the normal routine.