At work and IN LOVE Best practices to follow before engaging in relationship with colleague
L| ove is a many-splendored thing, but does it have a place in the office?
Dating in the office, even between two colleagues at the same level, is definitely risky. In addition to issues that are inevitable in any relationship, like arguments and breakups, colleagues who date have to navigate professional landmines like conflicts of interest and office politics.
Despite the potential for professional and personal problems, workplace romances abound, according to a February study from career website Vault.com. Vault’s annual Office Romance Survey reported that 30% of respondents between the ages of 18 and 21 had engaged in an office romance, with the number climbing to more than 70% of respondents over age 50.
Whether you’re an employee considering a new relationship or a company trying to refine its policy, if you’re concerned about properly maneuvering office romances, these tips from workplace experts might help.
said, companies must provide regular training for employees and managers.
“Every company needs to train their employees on sexual harassment (as well as) their managers and that training should be separate … bystander training is something that a lot of companies are considering right now ... to show employees how they can intervene if somebody’s being mistreated in the office, or if they think that something inappropriate is going on,” Holubeck said.
Sponenberg thinks a company’s policy should stop short of banning all relationships.
“Office relationships happen and when you’re in an environment where you prohibit them, people are just going to do it anyway and do it behind the company’s back … you’re better off having those discussions in an open forum rather than having people sneak around,” Sponenberg said. family member or somebody like that,” Holubeck said.
Holubeck also calls out the potential for impropriety if a supervisor begins using his or her power to influence the relationship.
There “are positions where it is impossible to date almost anybody in your workplace because it is going to create either an impression of improper behavior or the potential for improper behavior,” Holubeck said.
While she was dating her husband, Sponenberg recalls keeping the relationship secret from her colleagues until they announced that they were getting married. Once her relationship became public, Sponenberg took extra steps to assure her husband’s subordinates that it wouldn’t impact her work.
“We talked with people and said, ‘I know this is hard to believe, but I’m doing my job, I’m professional, unbiased, but still, here are the alternate paths that you can go to if there’s an issue and you’re not comfortable,’ ” Sponenberg said.
While you may believe your new fling won’t impact your work, your employer might have different feelings. Once a relationship begins and is disclosed, Holubeck says the two parties should prepare for consequences.
“They need to talk with the company to see what steps they can take to minimize the impact on the workforce. … They may need to make a choice on how that relationship can continue if one of them may need to find a different job,” Holubeck said.
Sponenberg recalls that although she and her husband were peers, she offered to quit when they reported their relationship. Sponenberg says if she’d been at a large legacy company she probably would have left.
Vault’s study notes that most people who engage in workplace relationships haven’t soured on them. Nearly three-quarters of respondents (72%) said they’d participate in another office romance.
“You may not be able to help who you fall in love with,” Robyn Flint, an insurance specialist at ExpertInsuranceReviews.com, says. “Just make sure you know how to act appropriately when you fall in love.”
Ultimately, it’s up to you and your employer to take appropriate steps to keep falling in love from making you fall out of favor on the job.