To keep dog out of home, invoke ‘doctor’s orders’

or allow us to do so. There have been many ugly scenes causing many hard feelings.

My husband needs peace and quiet. He cannot break up dogfights or risk a fall tripping over her dog. I need to be able to pay attention to his needs, not spend the time arguing with his mother and cleaning up the dog’s messes.

Since she has lied more than once about leaving her dog at home (the dog was “just too sad,” and we are “being mean”), we do not trust her to respect boundaries.

So, it seems that we must tell her that neither of them may visit. Is there a polite yet firm way to tell her this?

Gentle reader: “I’m afraid that we can’t accept visitors while Horatio is recovering. We’ll let you know when the doctor says it’s OK for us to do so.”

Notice that while Miss Manners’ wording invokes your doctor’s authority, it does not strictly implicate him in a lie. Still, given your mother-in-law’s apparent obstinance, it would not be a bad idea to ask for something from him in writing.

Dear Miss Manners: I have long wondered about those tiny straws that one receives in mixed drinks in restaurants and bars: They seem more suited to stirring drinks than sipping them. I always just take them out, and drink the beverage from the glass. I can’t help noticing that I’m in the minority, though. Are you really supposed to drink through them?

Gentle reader: Etiquette is more forgiving of being overly, than underly, formal, and the straw is the tank top of eating utensils. Miss Manners has no objection to discarding it in the accompanying paper napkin, whether you are doing so because you need a stiff drink or because the effort of pulling liquid through such a tiny aperture gives you a headache.

Dear Miss Manners: One of my very good friends asked me a year ago if I could commit to being his date for two weddings. He is on a two-year program out of the country and, as it happens, he can no longer attend the first one, which is fine. The second wedding, however, is still a go, and he has reminded me multiple times to keep my schedule open (as I travel a lot for work).

I just had a conversation with him, and while we were catching up, I discovered (when I asked) that I am no longer invited if his recent foreign girlfriend is able to obtain a visa and attend the wedding with him instead. If she is not able to attend, he assumed that I would still want to accompany him.

Am I wrong for feeling that this is rude? I have already indicated that I do not want to attend at all, as I was not aware that I was a backup plan. Please advise, as this is a close friend of 10 years.

Gentle reader: At some point in their lives, everyone will issue an invitation to their B list — whether to fit in among couples, to fill a place setting or to provide a last-minute fourth for bridge.

Among truly close friends or relatives, it may be possible to have an understanding that filling in is a favor that will be reciprocated when the other person needs a maybe-date in the future. If it was understood that this was a convenience, rather than a date, you should not be insulted.

But as you have been asked to keep your own travel plans on hold for a long time, you may be excused for rescinding your acceptance. If your replacement is not able to attend, surely your friend can manage attending a wedding on his own.

read the “report card” on my recycling trash bin, and I resent being called ignorant by someone whose main ambition in life is to improve their trash disposal skills.

to inform you, but you’re going to have to stay ticked off because bathrooms already have remotes. For example, if you want one, you can get a very elaborate combination toilet seat/ bidet with a nice multi-function remote.

the City of Orlando? How can they allow Domino’s to remove a historic landmark with just a simple request? Where is the historic preservation in that process? And what’s wrong with Domino’s? Couldn’t they have used a little creativity to save a historic landmark while creating a vibe, increasing visibility and showing concern for our city’s history? I can see it now — “Porter Paints Presents Pizza by Domino’s.“I won’t order from Domino’s again. No respect equals no pizza.

at the stoners who live two doors down, who smoke “weed” in their backyard by the fence while the next door neighbor’s dogs are outside. Their weed smoke causes the dogs to behave badly, barking nonstop. The dogs do not act like this when there are not any stoners smoking. “Weed” smoking is against the law; when will the police arrest these idiots?