Essential worker feels tired, forgotten

Dear Amy: I am an essential worker. I work with the public on a daily basis. Times have been hard for everyone, and my heart goes out to those who are suffering. I am thankful that for the most part my family is happy and healthy.

At my job, which I love, I have been thanked for my service but also had an equal number of people say, “Well, at least you’re working.” I have seen society slowly decay.

At night as I drive home, I have had people just walk out into the streets disregarding the cars driving by. I have seen homeless camps pop up in parking lots of closed stores. People don’t even try to hide their theft — they just take.

With all the closed places out there, the ones that have been open are being overrun. We essential workers are tired and feel that we are also forgotten. The unemployed have been getting more from the government than I make in a month. I am struggling to pay my bills and would be losing my house if not for family and friends.

All I want is for someone to acknowledge that we are in need too. Thank you for listening.

Dear One: You don’t say what work you do, but whether you work in a store, a warehouse, a post office, hospital, precinct, school, coffee shop, cafe or fast-food restaurant, you are valuable and, yes, essential. You are valuable as a person, as a worker and as a provider for your family.

And yes, you are also lucky to be working. You say that you love your job, and that’s a bonus.

Those on unemployment are facing a financial cliff and a lot of uncertainty as their government benefits run out. They don’t have what you have: steady employment doing work you love, and the ability to provide for yourself and your family in the longer term. Many of the strangers you encounter each day wish they could say they were “essential.” You know that you are, and I hope you feel “seen” in the way you deserve to be.

Regarding your experience and your perceptions of the current state of the world, I think it’s more important than ever for all of us to be gentle toward others, and with ourselves. Please, don’t judge others in a way that you don’t want to be judged.

Dear Amy: I have recently had a lot of success selling some items on eBay.

My friend now wants me to sell some things for her. I told her that I would be glad to come to her home, help her set up an account, take photos, help her write the descriptions, etc.

We are both in our 60s, so I thought I could show her what I have learned. No, she wants me to do it all. Her excuse is that she doesn’t have a computer now, but she has an iPad with Wi-Fi. She tells me she doesn’t trust the internet.

What do you suggest I do?

Dear Seller: It might be time to start your own business. You could sell your friend’s stuff and receive a percentage of the profit as compensation. You could also buy her things from her outright and perhaps make a profit reselling them.

Otherwise, you have generously offered to assist her. If you don’t want to do any more, you can just tell her, “Well, you can do this yourself, and I’ve offered to show you how. But if you don’t want to, that’s up to you. You can also donate your things, and that might be the better choice for you.”

Dear Amy: “Torn and Troubled in LA” spoke to their sadness in losing a relationship with their son’s former girlfriend.

I too left a relationship after almost a decade with my ex. Losing my ex’s parents was one of the hardest parts of that breakup, and to this day, I miss those wonderful people dearly.

I still think of them often and still feel an ache from that loss ... six years later. Moving on with your life and properly healing from a breakup unfortunately often means no contact with your second set of parents, but I will be forever thankful for their love and kindness.

Dear Ever-Grateful: I hope that at some point you will take the opportunity to send these people a note, acknowledging their impact on your life and expressing your gratitude.