Conference attendee has a professional beef

DEAR AMY >> I attended a professional conference recently.

The attendees from my company were the president, the executive director, a co-worker, and myself.

The president and executive director invited my co-worker and myself out for dinner.

During these large conventions, it is rare to be able to sit down for more than 20 minutes and have a balanced meal. This made the dinner event really nice for us, and I appreciated it.

Prior to ordering, the conversation turned to, “What will you have?”

When I stated that I wanted the chicken soup, I was scolded by my coworker, who exclaimed: “These people are vegetarian!” (gesturing to the president and executive director). This was not stated discreetly.

Was it wrong of me to order the meal I wanted and that would sustain me for the five hours of events taking place after dinner?

Do my dietary restrictions and concerns take a back seat when the boss is picking up the tab?

— Need Protein to

Function

DEAR NEED PROTEIN >>

Your co-worker took the opportunity to demonstrate an advanced level of personal knowledge of your bosses, in order to curry flavor (excuse the pun) with these professional superiors.

Flaunting this knowledge is professionally risky — and rude.

In bringing you to this convention, the people who run your company have given you and your co-worker an opportunity to positively and responsibly represent the organization. Loudly scolding another person at lunch is anti-social.

Your co-worker's rudeness made you uncomfortable. This behavior also highlighted a dietary choice that some people might consider personal, possibly also making them uncomfortable.

I hope your bosses responded to this by letting you know that they have no beef with you regarding your own choices.

Your colleague's effort to suck up by shaming you is extremely unappetizing.

DEAR AMY >> “Engaged and Worried” didn't ask his much-younger brother to be in his wedding. Your response was spot on!

I too had a brother 12 years younger, and I headed off to college and the service when he was only six. Although he meant a lot to me, the vast difference in our ages and outlook was always too much to completely erase.

It is still a major source of regret.

Nevertheless, he was an important part of my wedding, a decision which has grown in significance now that he is gone.

He died of AIDS in his 30s, and left a hole in my life.

Jim, I still miss you and will love you always.

— Loving Brother

DEAR LOVING BROTHER >> Here's to Jim. RIP, dear brother.