No hero sandwich

If President Donald Trump were a sandwich, the recipe would call for an inch-thick slab of baloney to be placed between two stale slices of extra-white, extra-rich bread. This colonclogger would be served with a side of cheesy lies and a dipping sauce made from clarified blubber, mixed with pure gall, and it would be flushed down with a magnum of overpriced Trump Meritage 2015.

This “Nero” sandwich, aptly named after another incompetent stumblebum, consumed daily, over the next four years, won’t just super-size Uncle Sam, it’ll kill him.

So, what can we Democrats do? Shut down Café Trump! And how do we accomplish that?

By, once again, becoming the inclusive party of the people! Let’s let go of the blame game, and quit condemning fellow Democrats for Hillary Clinton’s defeat. Remember that countless Americans have died or been wounded so that you have the right to vote your conscience, and as long as you vote as your conscience dictates, you have acted honorably. Democrats must quickly unify and take back both houses of Congress. If that doesn’t happen, say goodbye to the middle class!

Open your hearts, and spread this message of love to your fellow Democrats: It’s OK not to march in goosestep with our party’s ultra-liberal elite! We’ll still be buds if you don’t agree 100 percent of the time with the party’s heralded agenda. We love you, we appreciate you and we need you to shutter Café Trump! ROB BILLER

Fombell