‘Overwhelming fear’
Former Steeler, wife bring light to postpartum depression problems
Alan Faneca and his wife, Julie, tried for five years to have their first child. But when their daughter, Anabelle, finally arrived in summer 2005, Ms. Faneca didn’t feel the joy she expected.
Instead, she was paralyzed with anxiety, unable to even get out of bed to lift her daughter from her cradle. She and her husband were home in Louisiana after the Steelers’ 2004-05 season.
“It was completely off the wall for me, an overwhelming amount of fear,” said Ms. Faneca, sitting this week in a conference room Downtown at the Omni William Penn hotel.
“I think most moms when they bring a new baby home are fearful, and every sound they make they check on them and everything. But I think there’s an elevated level where OK, I’m not sleeping, I’m not responding correctly.”
Ms. Faneca’s symptoms were so severe that she called her doctor immediately to obtain prescription medication that enabled her to function. She would repeat the process two more times after the birth of her second and third children, Burton, 8, and Penelope, 5.
The Fanecas, who now live in Virginia Beach, are partnering with Steven D’Achille, founder of the Alexis Joy D’Achille Foundation for
Postpartum Depression, to raise awareness of the illness. The couple discussed their experiences on a visit to Pittsburgh this week, days before they will travel to the Super Bowl in Miami to find out whether the former Steelers offensive lineman will be inducted into the Pro Football Hall of Fame.
Mr. Faneca was aware of postpartum depression before Anabelle, now 14, was born, “but I didn’t think it was going to happen to us. I thought it was something that’s extremely rare, which it isn’t,” he said.
“Because of the stigma, no one talks about it,” his wife added.
Postpartum mental illness is the most common complication of pregnancy, affecting an estimated 1 in 7 new mothers, according to the American Psychological Association. Symptoms can include withdrawal from loved ones, feeling distant from the baby and prolonged sadness beyond just a brief period of “baby blues.”
For each of her children, Ms. Faneca stayed on medication for three to six months to recover, she said.
About half of those affected by postpartum depression don’t receive treatment because they either don’t have access to the proper medical resources or are too embarrassed or overwhelmed to ask for help, Mr. D’Achille said.
He founded the Alexis Joy D’Achille Foundation for Postpartum
Depression after his wife, Alexis, killed herself six weeks after the birth of their daughter. Through fundraising and advocacy, he was able to help launch the Alexis Joy D’Achille Center for Perinatal Mental Health at West Penn Hospital.
Ms. Faneca decided to speak publicly in part because of her experience five years ago after the birth of their third child, Penelope, in northern Virginia.
She had informed her doctor of her prior history with postpartum depression, but when her symptoms arrived after the birth, he was reluctant to prescribe the medication that had worked for her in the past. He suggested that she might just need additional help cleaning her house or watching her other kids, she said. Ms. Faneca struggled to keep her anxiety under control that weekend.
“Going and taking a warm shower isn’t going to cure you,” she said. “Everything might take the edge off for a second but nothing, at that point ... it needs medical assistance.”
By Sunday night, she and Mr. Faneca were driving around to urgent care centers trying to get someone to prescribe her the medication. No one would do it because she had recently had a baby and was under the care of a doctor.
She went back to the doctor’s
office first thing Monday morning — bringing her “muscle,” her husband, with her — so that he could describe her symptoms to the doctor. With her husband’s help, she was able to get the medication, though she knew it would still take up to a week for her body to feel its effects.
Ms. Faneca remembers how supportive her friends and family were when she shared her initial struggles after Anabelle’s birth.
“I was ready to walk out the door and leave forever, without my child or my husband with me,” she said. “They knew it was time to get help. I wasn’t myself.”
As her friends got pregnant, she talked to them during their pregnancies, letting them know about her experience and to be watchful for their own symptoms. She always checked in after their babies were born, she said.
“You’d be surprised how many people end up breaking down and saying, ‘Hey, I need help.’”