In-laws could pose a threat to couple’s reconciliation

DEAR ABBY: I have been married for 15 years and love my wife very much, but we drifted apart. Then I went and did something really stupid and had an affair. It lasted only a few weeks, and I regret it. My now-ex-wife and I are still working on our relationship. Yes, it was the wrong thing to do, but because of the affair, we have grown closer than we have ever been.

My problem is her parents. She’s worried how they will react. They dislike me intensely now and would run me over with their car if they got the chance. They have also trash-talked me to our children. (My parents have never said anything bad about her and never would.)

It has been a year, and her parents don’t know we are working on staying together. They keep trying to set her up on dates. I feel like I’m a secret. Help! — WORKING IT OUT IN IOWA

DEAR WORKING IT OUT: I’m sorry you didn’t explain more about how you and your ex are trying to work things out. From where I sit, her parents are not the problem. The problem is her reluctance to talk to them like the adult she is and tell them your — and her — intention to reconcile. It’s natural that they are angry with you for cheating on their daughter and are trying to introduce her to eligible men now she’s divorced. The two of you should enlist the help of a licensed marriage and family counselor, not only to help you reconcile, but also to repair the breach with her family.