Windy’s fav-o-rite things

“Don’t you just love this time of year?” said Doc. “Football season. Rodeo finals coming up soon. Time to go hunting. All that stuff.”

Windy Wilson sipped at his coffee. Oh good. Doc gave us another topic.

“Sports,” Windy said. “Thems my putner fav-o-rite things … well, ‘long with dogs … and country musicals and that kinder thing.”

The guys at the philosophy counter of the Mule Barn truck stop grinned at Windy, who has yet to encounter a sentence or thought he couldn’t improve.

“So,” said Steve, the tall cowboy of the bunch, “what’s your favorite sport, Windy?”

“That’d have to be individuated sinchernized swimmin’ I think. Or mebbe them ribbons them little flippitly-floppity girls swing ‘round so it looks like they’re in trouble.”

“But Windy,” Doc put in, “those are girl events.” “Yeah they are,” Windy said, nodding. “But there’s somethin’ about ‘em, you know? Must be the cord-ination or somethin’. Anyhow, I like ‘em.”

“Always had a cowboy and hunting guide and camp cook figured for more manly sports, Windy. You know … shooting, rodeo, football …”

“Ahh… football! Why yessir, you definite hit on one of my pet sports. Love that there football. Why, at halftime them girls come out with their pommy poms and dance ‘round in shorty shorts …”

I think we all get the picture, don’t you? Slim Randles is a humorist and author of “Home Country” and “Strange Tales of Alaska,” both of which are available on Amazon His new book “A Fly Fisherman’s Bucket List” is now available at www. lpdpress.com