The Popcorn Stand: I miss marching bands

I have to admit one reason why I’m writing about marching bands in this Popcorn Stand is to present this joke that only those who are musicians and have watched “Kindergarten

Cop” would get.

Arnold Schwarzenegger was playing the Sousaphone in the marching band at a parade when someone in the crowd yelled “Hey nice tuba” to which Schwarzenegger replied in his thick accent, “It’s not a tooba.”

Anyway one of the rites of passage of fall I’ve always enjoyed is watching the marching bands. I played the drums in the marching band at Strathmore High School.

One of the things I love most about Porterville is its love for our local youth bands. And one story I love to tell about Porterville to those in my old stomping ground of Carson City involves Porterville’s love of bands.

When I worked for the Carson City newspaper, the Nevada Appeal, we did a story on how a neighbor complained about the noise that resulted from the Carson High Band rehearsing in the school’s parking lot at night. I will also note even though Carson High has a considerably larger student body than the high schools here, it’s band is much smaller than say the size of the Monache Marauder and Porterville Panther Bands.

When this story came up I had to share the story of how the Monache Band under the direction of Dale Anderson would rehearse three hours a night every night and could be heard from miles around — and nobody would dare to complain.

When I covered the education beat for the Porterville Recorder, one of my favorite assignments was covering band festivals, including the Monache Band at the Selma Band Festival.

And one of my favorite sites that I’m missing since there’s no high school football right now is watching the Porterville Panther Band march into Rankin Stadium before the varsity football game began. I still get a lump in my throat watching that every time. EVERY TIME.

And with apologies to the football players it has been said about Porterville instead of people rushing to the restroom and the concession stand at halftime, people rush back to their seats before halftime begins so they can watch the Monache and Porterville Bands perform their halftime shows.

I also love to watch the marching bands in the parades on TV. Actually I would love watching the marching bands if the TV hosts would shut up.

The host always drones on and on, talking over the band while it’s playing until finally the host says “let’s listen” and then you get to hear the band for like three seconds before they switch to the next float. To the hosts for when parades will be on television again, this is what you say: “This is such and such band.” That’s it. That way we can listen to the band at least for a little longer than a few seconds — if not actually for a minute or so.

I’m also such an old fuddy duddy I wished they would just go back to the marching bands during the Super Bowl halftime show instead of the elaborate shows that are done now.

Marching bands are as American as the Chinese food takeout box (An American invention). And even though they may be missing for a while, they’re here to stay.