BEST JOB EVER
boys on as soon as they met the 48-inch height requirement.
Now 29 and 27, my sons, who have caught up to my current mental age when it comes to theme parks, said they enjoyed walking down memory lane with their old man on our guys' day at Knott's. They graced me by going on the Calico Railroad with a half-hour wait, shamed my putrid score on the reimagined 4-D version of Knott's Bear-y Tales, and loved HangTime, with its 90-degree ascent and ridiculously steep drop. I'd be lying if I didn't admit to getting misty-eyed over the three of us experiencing GhostRider together for the first time.
Adult commitments prevented us from taking in Knott's Scary Farm that evening, but we did get a fun-sized taste of an early Halloween, thanks to the park's daytime familyfriendly version. I don't recall whether I worked two or three Halloween Haunts, the original name of Knott's frightening fall classic, but back in my day professional makeup artists and costume designers worked their macabre magic on us in admissions. Since the event always sold out, once ticketholders went through the gate, we were allowed to go on “scare patrol.”
Few things in life are as much fun as sneaking up on unsuspecting souls as a bloody vampire in the dark shadows of Boot Hill Cemetery. On the flip side, nothing is more humiliating than slipping on a spilled Coke while chasing cuties in the middle of Ghost Town. Dracula down! Faceplanted with a couple of scraped kneecaps, I lay on the road for several minutes like an undead nocturnal slug. Having my cape clumsily draped over my head was the cherry on top. Instead of a wooden stake, I was thrown a life preserver when a girl poked the small of my back to check if I were still alive, and that was my cue to jump up and scream like Frankenstein passing a stone. The hilarity of it all eclipsed the pain.
As my bestie Barbra would sing, these are the misty water-colored memories of the way we were. It's kinda strange when you think about it — recollections of a part-time job dating back some 45 years that are so fond and vivid they feel like yesterday. Could Knott's be my personal Rosebud from “Citizen Kane”? Time will tell. All I know is how wonderful it was to give my blood, sweat and tears of laughter to Knott's Berry Farm.
Best job ever.