Visitors feel the need to express dissatisfaction with reader’s home

Dear Abby: I like to host parties for my kids, family events and game nights with friends. I love when my home is filled with loving family and friends. But when we open our home, there always seems to be someone who feels it necessary to point out something wrong with our home or something that should be fixed. It drives me nuts! I find it hard to respond without sounding snotty. I would love it if you could give me examples of what I can say to deflect those not-sohelpful comments.

— Host In Illinois

Dear Host: Allow me to offer you a menu. Feel free to pick and choose as you please:

1. “Oh, my! I hadn’t noticed.”

2. “Thank you for pointing that out. I’ll have it fixed before you come back over.” (And don’t invite the person again.)

3. “The next time you visit, be sure to bring along your wrench.”

Dear Abby: For our anniversary, I bought my wife a $1,500 necklace and told her that if she wanted, it could be exchanged at the store within a month.

The following week she went out with some friends and came back with a different piece of jewelry from the store that cost an additional $800. Besides the financial aspect, I’m feeling hurt that what I gave was not adequate enough for her. Am I being too sensitive here?

— Hurt Feelings

In Boca Raton

Dear Hurt Feelings: You are a generous and loving husband. You should not, however, feel hurt that your wife exchanged the necklace. You told her she could, and she took you up on it. Perhaps next time you should consider asking her what she would like, so you can choose the gift “together.”