Woman wonders why son did not reveal his partner’s miscarriage

Dear Abby: I thought my son and I were close. Recently, I learned that his girlfriend had a miscarriage. I learned about it from an email his girlfriend sent me, and I have also learned he told another relative he’s close to about the miscarriage. I called his girlfriend after receiving her email and expressed my sympathy, inquired about her health and told her that I would keep her and my son in my prayers. My feelings are hurt because I didn’t hear about the pregnancy/miscarriage from my son, and he disclosed it to another relative instead. I thought we could discuss anything. Should I express how I feel and ask why he felt he couldn’t share with me?

— Overlooked

in Florida

Dear Overlooked:

Resist the urge to personalize this the way you have. If you are smart, you will think long and hard — a few months, perhaps — before asking your son that question. Take this opportunity to work on the things that aren’t right in your relationship with your son. He may have had other things on his mind.

Dear Abby: My mother-in-law has a disgusting habit: Whenever I’m starting to cook something with raw hamburger, she grabs a mouthful. I have tried explaining how dangerous it is, but she won’t listen to reason. She says she’s been doing it since she was a kid (she’s 80 now). I’ve tried pointing out that the meat supply is not the same as it was then, but her response is “it hasn’t hurt me yet!” Please advise.

— Careful Cook

in Carolina

Dear Cook: I’ll try. Go to the U.S. Food and Drug Administration website (fda.gov) and search on “eating raw ground beef.” When you do, you will find printable information about the dangers of E. coli, which is most prevalent.