HOROSCOPE
ARIES
(March 21 to April 19)
If you have to help someone else today, you won’t mind doing so because you see that it’s the right thing to do. Indeed, it will give you a sense of satisfaction.
TAURUS
(April 20 to May 20)
Your interaction with a friend or a group is important today. This relationship might improve you, improve the other person or improve the bond between you.
GEMINI
(May 21 to June 20)
You make a favorable impression on bosses, teachers and parents today. They see you as talented in an artistic way. A flirtation with a boss might begin today.
CANCER
(June 21 to July 22)
Your desire to do something to expand your world is strong today. Most of you will not be able to travel, but you can explore your world through books and the internet.
LEO
(July 23 to Aug. 22)
This is a passionate day! Romance will sizzle! However, you feel just as passionate about financial matters and shared property. Nothing is casual.
VIRGO
(Aug. 23 to Sept. 22)
Your one-on-one relationship with someone today will be eventful and powerful. You might influence this person for the better or, vice versa, they will benefit you.
LIBRA
(Sept. 23 to Oct. 22)
Be willing to accept the help of co-workers or others regarding your job today or any task that you set for yourself. People are sincere about wanting to help. Be open enough to accept their offer.
SCORPIO
(Oct. 23 to Nov. 21)
Romance, playful diversions, sports and fun activities with kids will delight you today. The bottom line is you want to have fun!
SAGITTARIUS
(Nov. 22 to Dec. 21)
Set aside some time today to do something to make where you live look more attractive. Or, perhaps, you will use this same energy to improve family relationships.
CAPRICORN
(Dec. 22 to Jan. 19)
Most days we’re on autopilot. But now and then we really “see” the world around us. Today you appreciate your environment. What a blessing!
AQUARIUS
(Jan. 20 to Feb. 18)
You feel passionately about your possessions or something to do with your wealth today. For example, if you want to buy something, you really want it.
PISCES
(Feb. 19 to March
20)
This is the perfect day to take a realistic look in the mirror and ask yourself what you can do to improve your appearance and the impression that you offer to your world. Ideas?
First off, Louis Armstrong was right about it being a wonderful world. And I realize many people suffer far worse troubles than mine.
But still…i would die of shock if I ever experienced 10 consecutive minutes of comfort, serenity and dignity. (Okay, anesthesia gave me two of the three; but instead of Doctors Without Borders, we need to mobilize Procedures Without Hospital Gowns.)
Through a combination of overcommitment, aging, Murphy’s Law and innate klutziness, I am a man of constant aggravation.
True, I have outgrown zits, dandruff, warts and absent-mindedly locking my keys in the car. But aches, pains, frequent bathroom visits, sinus pressure and mild asthma play tag team to fill the vacuum.
Ten minutes after I bypass a Nail Clippers R Us kiosk, I spontaneously develop the Mother of All Hangnails. Half an hour after I’ve scrutinized myself in my bathroom mirror, acquaintances are abruptly exposed to a nose hair that resembles something a junior high P.E. class always dreaded climbing
I faithfully strive to look presentable in public, but inevitably I transform into what my mother would call “slouchy.” There is a pants leg crammed into a sock, a smear of who-knows-what on my eyeglasses, a mysterious food stain from an animal that was hunted to extinction 150 years ago and a trousers fly that is 95 percent zipped but will elicit a Good Samaritan’s shout from across a crowded room, nonetheless.
Jeans that fit perfectly yesterday suddenly have me tugging at them like I’m a (slightly) more svelte “Matt Foley, Motivational Speaker.” And I dread going to my own version of the “van down by the river,” because there is always a seatbelt buckle that gets slammed in the car door, a sideview mirror that (truth in advertising!) gives me a panoramic view of the SIDE OF THE CAR and a towering pile of food wrappers that show the calorie content in hieroglyphs.
Granted, I have seldom experienced the classic toilet-paper-trailing-fromthe-shoe humiliation, but I believe I could unerringly step in dog poop at a Garfield Look-alike Contest. Similarly, I have a sixth sense for seeking out staplers without staples, sticky notes without stickiness, and battery-operated devices without batteries. I’m glad I’m just FLIRTIN’ with disaster, because if I tried to write down her phone number, the pen would promptly explode in my pocket. (“Wait…i’ll just MEMORIZE it…after deleting extraneous information. There. Hey, didn’t I used to know how to drive a stick?”)
Coins and keys relentlessly create holes in my pockets. Receipts can’t wait to wiggle out of my wallet. Notes containing brilliant column ideas somehow defy gravity and escape from my shirt pocket. (Surely it was aftereffects of anesthesia, but I thought I heard my left nipple cheering, “Nobody’s looking – let me boost you over the top to freedom.”)
Honestly, I try to live a simple life. For me, a “three-way” means the cat is throwing up on IRS documents at the same time the unbalanced load of laundry goes “WHOMP WHOMP…” and an altruistic individual calls to Make My Day with an extended warranty on band candy.
Thanks for letting me vent. I could ramble on a lot longer, but I see by the clock on the wall…allow for not springing forward…remember you’re running three minutes fast…
Sigh Only I could get nostalgic for zits, dandruff and warts.
A Rome man was arrested early Wednesday on a felony methamphetamine possession after a police officer noticed him making frequent short stops at several hotels on Martha Berry Boulevard, reports stated.
According to Floyd County Jail reports:
A drug sniffing dog gave a positive alert in the area of a black Nissan Pathfinder driven by 49-year-old Brian Michael Evans. Evans had been pulled over with a malfunctioning tag light after police noticed him traveling back and forth from several hotels in the area.
Police found meth residue in his backpack and a small corner baggie of meth and marijuana Evans had tossed under the patrol car.
Evans is additionally charged with misdemeanor possession of drug-related objects, possession of less than one ounce of marijuana and tampering with evidence. He remained in jail Wednesday on $5,700 bond.
Police: Man had meth,
scales
A Rome man was arrested early Wednesday on a felony meth charge after a traffic stop at Robin Hood Road and Doncaster Drive, reports stated.
According to Floyd County Jail reports:
Thomas Edward Lyda II, 28, also faces a misdemeanor charge of possession of drug-related objects. The Floyd County Police Department report states Lyda had a baggie of meth as well as a digital scale and glass pipe in his possession when he was pulled over. He remained in jail without bond Wednesday on a probation hold.
Alabama man faces
meth charge
A Floyd County police officer arrested a Cedar Bluff, Alabama, man on methamphetamine charges in Lindale early Wednesday, reports stated.
According to Floyd County Jail reports:
Micah Bradley Proctor, 23, faces a felony meth possession charge as well as misdemeanor possession of drug-related objects and driving without a license in his possession. He was released from jail on $7,900 bond Wednesday afternoon.
Floyd County man faces exploitation,
battery charges
A 33-year-old Rome man faces a felony charge of exploitation and intimidation of disabled adults or elderly people, reports stated.
According to Floyd County Jail reports:
Matthew Dylan Akins was arrested at his Livingston Road home on Tuesday. He also faces a felony charge of simple assault under the Family Violence Act. He remained in jail without bond on Wednesday.
Woman reports theft of school internet hotspot
A woman told the Rome Police Department that someone had taken the T-mobile hotspot loaned to her by the Rome City School system.
According to Rome Police Department reports:
There were several people at her East 20th Street residence previous to the hotspot going missing, the woman told police. Once she contacted the school system she was told “she would have to find it or owe the school $2,000.” The woman told police she would recover the hotspot.
Tools stolen from South Broad St. home
Tools and construction equipment valued at $1,000 were taken from a home in the 800 block of South Broad Street.
According to Rome Police Department reports:
The complainant stated the equipment was taken recently and suspected a neighbor who had taken some porch furniture was to blame. No arrests had been made in the reported thefts.