Other mothers go silent when it is time to follow through on playdates

Dear Abby: I am a mom of two boys, 8 and 12. They both have best friends whose moms I like and I would like to be friends with. My problem is, when we set up a playdate for the boys or make plans, when the time comes around and I text them about it, I don’t hear back from them at all.

I’m bipolar, and I have social anxiety, so when

I say yes to something, it is huge for me. When they don’t respond, I feel as though I am annoying them or they’re mad at me for some reason. The rejection is starting to upset me, and it’s upsetting my children, especially my 8-year-old. How do I deal with flaky moms without ruining my relationship?

— Rejected in California

Dear Rejected: Have these women EVER agreed to a playdate with your children? Flaky is not the way I would describe them. Rude bordering on cruel would be more accurate. It’s time to start cultivating relationships with other mothers.

Dear Abby: My late husband was of the Jewish faith. Our children and I are not. Through the years, kind and generous friends and neighbors have sent cards and gifts for Jewish holidays, which makes me very uncomfortable. What wording would you suggest I use to have this practice discontinued without seeming rude or unappreciative?

— Non-jewish in Illinois

Dear Non-jewish: You can get your point across to these thoughtful people by saying something like this: “I appreciate your thoughtfulness, but you should know that although my husband followed the Jewish religion, my children and I do not. We are ___________.” Frankly, you should have spoken up years ago.