Parent decides to keep her kids away from family’s dramatics and fights

Dear Abby: I grew up in a big lower-class family in which there has always been drama, fights, gossip, etc. I made a vow to myself that when I had my own family, I would raise them better. I keep myself and my children distanced from all of that. Am I wrong for keeping them away from my family? I don’t like drama or problems. Sometimes I miss my family, but after a while, I get overwhelmed.

— Separate In Chicago

Dear Separate: As a parent, your responsibility is to protect your children. If you feel exposing them to something might be harmful, you are within your rights to keep them away. However, if you are raising your children in a healthy environment, exposing them to your family drama in LIMITED DOSES isn’t likely to be harmful. Afterward, if your relatives behaved badly, use it as a teaching moment.

Dear Abby: I have a neighbor who lives across the street. She’s in her late 70s. We’ve been friendly until recently, when she came to visit with me for coffee. We talked about many different things that day. She had brought me a present and homemade cookies.

When I mentioned something that apparently she didn’t like or believe, she stood up, announced that she didn’t come over to feel “uncomfortable” and left in a huff! I emailed her and sent a handwritten apology,. What should I do with her unopened gift and cookies? I don’t feel comfortable accepting them.

— Dazed And Confused

Dear D & C: How sad that your neighbor wasn’t able to tell you what it was you said that made her so uncomfortable she felt she had to end the relationship. However, her decision seems to have been made, and you will have to accept it. Because you now feel uncomfortable, return her gift and the cookies.