Husband wants wife’s history to repeat itself

DEAR ABBY » I am a 44-year-old woman who has been married for three years. We all have a past. Unfortunately, I made mistakes in mine that I foolishly mentioned to my husband when he asked. He is someone who doesn’t let go of things easily.

I had a threesome in my early 20s, which I didn’t think was a big deal because I was young and experimenting with my sexuality. He’s now insisting on my having one with him. He thinks I cheated on him because when we met nine years ago, I was still friends with the people involved. I love him, but I feel like he wants to have his cake and eat it too. What should I do? — Cornered in

Louisiana

DEAR CORNERED »

If you’re against the idea, you should refuse. And if he persists with his wacky idea, the only “threesome” you should agree to would involve the two of you and a licensed marriage and family therapist.

DEAR ABBY » I’m an inmate at the women’s prison. My fiance and I have been together for four years and have four little ones under the age of 4.

I am getting mad at him for not writing often or sending photos. I realize he’s busy taking care of the babies, but am I being selfish to think he should make time for me?

— Inmate Mom

in Nevada

DEAR MOM » Because you have more time on your hands than he does, spend some of it writing to HIM and the CHILDREN. Tell them how much you love and miss them. Describe your daily activities and your hopes for them. If you do, it may make your bond with them stronger and bring them closer to you until you are released.