Pumpers pop-up delivers R-rated burger

If you’ve ever wondered what an R-rated hamburger experience looks like, we have the answer.

Pumpers has evolved into a debauched “adult burger store” block party helmed by noted San Antonio chef Stefan Bowers every Sunday at the St. Mary’s Strip wine bar Little Death. Many of the menu item names and promotional materials are decidedly NSFW. (Pro tip: the “Magic Assholes” are candied jalapeños.)

I recently indulged in a Pumpers #1 — two patties with cheese, mustard, ketchup, onions and pickles on a squishy, toasted bun — and am eagerly awaiting the next opportunity to get a fix. These classic smashburgers begin life as a ball of ground beef that’s smooshed onto a blazing hot griddle and seared to a hard, caramelized, well-seasoned char on both sides. The cheese that gets layered on top of those patties oozes over as it melts, creating an irresistible cheese crust around the edges.

Two of those patties then get stacked onto toasted buns that make a valiant effort to contain all the grease and goo. It isn’t pretty, but oh my, is it ever enjoyable. When I stopped by, Bowers was handing out burgers for free as an acknowledgment of our collective survival of the recent arctic freeze in San Antonio, but they normally run $7 each.

Bowers launched Pumpers as a side project at his downtown pizzeria Playland a year ago. It grew popular enough to merit the Sunday St. Mary’s pop-up.

Bowers is known as the chef behind one of San Antonio’s swankiest seafood restaurants, Rebelle in the St. Anthony hotel, among other high-end eateries, including Battalion and the late Feast. But his skill with grease and griddles made me wish more top-shelf chefs would give us simple, damn delicious hamburgers.

Warning: plan for a crowd. Pumpers sizzles up about 150 burgers every Sunday and starts taking orders at noon, with a cutoff when they sell out. Get in line early at 2327 N. St. Mary’s St. to grab one for yourself. More on Instagram @pumpers_world and online at pumpers.world.

Paul Stephen / Staff The Pumpers #1 is two beef patties and cheese on a toasted bun with mustard, ketchup, onions and pickles.