Reader needs her accomplishments to be recognized

Dear Carolyn: I’m in my late 20s, and lucky to have a great career and people I’m on friendly terms with — some to be friends in the future, hopefully. But every now and then I find myself craving some external validation for how far I’ve gone.

I was living out of my car at one point and am now gainfully employed in the career of my choice and pretty well-adjusted (I think!). I take pride in those accomplishments, but I also find myself wishing from time to time that someone else could say, “I see where you’ve been and how far you’ve come, and I just want to let you know I’m proud.” I don’t have any family and things were a bit chaotic for me growing up, so I don’t have people I’m close to from my past. What can I do in those moments when I find myself longing for a sort of phantom witness to my life, a ghost cheerleader who doesn’t exist?

Please, allow me: It is impressive how far you’ve come, and you’ve earned every pat on the back you can get. I’m sorry you don’t have a circle of knewyou-when intimates who can share your pride with you. That’s a lonely feeling. I wonder, though, if the sheer badassery of your arc can actually be your solution instead of the problem.

Have you considered turning your journey into art of some kind? Storytelling comes to mind, a la “The Moth” (themoth.org), because I have zero doubt that your experiences could fuel several trips to the stage. But there are so many options: essays, fiction, autobiography, poetry, a novel in verse, graphic novel with a collaborator if needed, poetry, standup comedy, song lyrics. The possibilities are limited only by your imagination, and in the expression alone I think you’ll feel validated and seen.

Chat with Carolyn online at 11 a.m. each Friday at www.washingtonpost.com.