Extremist lawmakers are breaking up my family
My family has lived in Texas for generations, raising children with the principles this state has historically embraced: faith, family and freedom. I’ve raised my own children with an active faith as a Christian parent of a precious transgender child living in Texas.
From the beginning, acceptance from our church was never an issue. When we learned that my child was transgender, there was no crisis of faith. Instead, as part of our Episcopal tradition, my child’s transition was joyfully celebrated with an official rite of renaming, where members pledged their support for my daughter. Meanwhile, in stark contrast to the loving support of our church, extremist politicians began targeting transgender kids and manufacturing political crises to motivate ultraconservative voters. Conservatives in Texas set a record in 2021: the highest number of ANTI-LGBTQ+ bills proposed in any state, with the majority aimed at transgender youth.
My daughter and I testified against these hateful bills, listening to vicious lies from witnesses and politicians. My child listened to lawmakers objectify her as they discussed “children’s genitalia” and debated her very existence. Fear that gender-affirming care could become illegal spread quickly across the state. Listening to other Christians dismiss the harm they were causing was devastating. Any theology that inspires thoughts of suicide in others conflicts with the Gospel.
Gender-affirming health care was lifesaving for my child, who felt so uncomfortable in her own skin I had to ask for permission to hug her; who was so unhappy she was planning to end her life, rather than be forced to continue living as a boy.
Like any parents would when faced with such a lifethreatening crisis, we consulted experts. For children, gender-affirming care can simply mean social support, like allowing a child to wear different clothes, get a new haircut or use a certain name. For older youth, it may involve medications that temporarily pause puberty. Decades of research has proven this kind of support dramatically lowers young people’s risk of depression and suicidal thoughts.
The care my daughter received returned a light to her eyes I hadn’t seen since early childhood. She blossomed into the whole person God created and spontaneous hugs were back in abundance! We wanted to relax into this hopeful time.
But instead, politicians directed the Department of Family and Protective Services to investigate parents of transgender children. The Texas Republican Party intensified its platform, opposing gender-affirming care for transgender people through age 21. Instead of embracing the joy of my daughter’s transition, we were forced to make a plan to keep our family safe.
Children regularly leave home to attend college — but being forced to flee the state your family calls home is devastating. Our daughter planned to stay in Texas to finish college. She wanted to be as close as possible to her 94-year-old grandmother. But extremist lawmakers took that away from her. This summer, our daughter will become the only one of our 20 family members to live outside Texas.
The 2023 legislative session is underway, with politicians introducing more than 100 ANTI-LGBTQ+ bills. Restricting our ability to make decisions for our children is dangerous government overreach, and this should be a warning to all parents in Texas, not only the parents of LGBTQ+ kids. I never thought I’d say it, but Texas is too small for my daughter.