DOORS OF CHANGE HELPED ME SO

When I look back and remember how it all started, anxiety, disassociation and uncertainty flood back in the form of memories. As an early adult, having barely graduated high school by the skin of my teeth, I could not stay in my hometown. Growing up in a small Indiana town was deteriorating my mental health. After freshly dropping out of college, I was quickly losing hope and my future looked more and more bleak.

To a teenager, anything can be the end of the world. For queer me, I was afraid. As I left it all behind in search of something, I could feel the dwindling hope fade away, like many others, locked in a cycle becoming eclipsed by jadedness and ultimately dread. I live in a cruel world of injustices, a world with closed doors, where the invisible youth starve on the streets, trying to survive, undergoing a form of hell where their community has forgotten them. Going from city to city, I learned about the horrific things that people are capable of. Those I met in the homeless community generally shared in these tragic experiences, leaving us with trauma we didn’t know how to cope with. We were trying to raise each other, while barely raising ourselves, either trying our best or giving up altogether. I’ve lost dear friends and loved ones due to homelessness in devastating ways. Everyone has a unique story and experience, so although I can only speak for myself, the parallel hardships faced by downtrodden youth speak volumes.

After a few years of trudging aimlessly, I arrived in California, going to Ocean Beach to busk with my violin. I was drawn to artsy towns because they are easier to blend in and avoid confrontation with local law enforcement. By word of mouth, I was recommended to direct myself to Ocean Beach because it has a reputation among transients for being kind to both the homeless and vagabonds alike. In a similar way, I heard about Doors of Change, which has been helping homeless youth in San Diego County since 2001, placing more than 2,300 in safe housing. Its music and art program immediately caught my interest. My violin is important to me.

Doors of Change helped me find access to several services that I did not know existed and also provided meals, clothes and hygiene supplies, food stamps, Medi-Cal, even therapy and housing opportunities. These services are crucial to initializing autonomy. Getting off of the street and becoming self-reliant is almost impossible when you have to search for a new safe place to sleep every night or struggle to make enough money to eat. The list of obstacles keeping youth homeless continues: from general hygiene, such as showering and shaving or having to wash your clothes, to finding transportation to go to a potential job interview.

All who volunteer and work at Doors of Change are dedicated to helping alleviate youth homelessness. The first step is gaining trust. The key is generated by its award-winning music and art program. I was able to earn musical instruments and art supplies after six lessons with the staff. I started feeling safer to open up and ask for help and I received the support I needed. For me, Doors of Change stands apart because it grows a sense of confidence in those it serves. This is provided by giving youth like me a chance to find a form of expression in a safe environment. This creates that trust.

In my experience, the best part of Doors of Change is the people dedicated to improving the lives of the youth, working day in and day out to support people like me becoming outstanding members of our community. From our diligent case managers, to the fantastic music and art instructors, to the benevolent volunteers cooking hot, homey meals, the combined efforts have proven, outstanding results. In spite of the pandemic, I look forward to the possibilities of what we can achieve. Together, we can make the world a better place.

In the next decade, I hope to accomplish a multitude of things. I personally am inspired to build a community to ensure a brighter tomorrow. As a musician, I want to tour the world as I immerse myself in the beauty of culture and food while simultaneously becoming involved in relief efforts and youth support abroad. When we believe in ourselves, anything is possible. When we work together, we can expand Doors of Change.

I was able to earn musical instruments and art supplies after six lessons from the organization’s staff.

Guist is is a music instructor and outreach worker at Doors of Change and lives in San Diego.