The parents of Pier 14 shooting victim Kate Steinle hope to leave the spotlight gracefully.
Family thrust into political glare models grace instead
Ever since July 1, when their daughter, Kate, was tragically shot and killed on Pier 14, allegedly by an immigrant in the country illegally, Jim Steinle and Liz Sullivan have been approached by well-meaning strangers.
They’ve seen the couple on TV talking about violent offenders without documentation and heard about Kate from presidential hopefuls like Donald Trump. They’ve seen the images of the photogenic 32-year-old Kate, and they want to express their sympathy and condolences. But sometimes there is a disconnect.
“They say, ‘You don’t appear to be angry,’ ” Steinle said. “And we’re not. There’s no room for angry. We’re sad, we’re grieving, but we’re not mad. We struggle a little with: Are we doing the right thing here? How do you keep it real and not get involved in the politics of the thing?”
It’s proved to be more difficult than anyone expected. Steinle and Sullivan had the misfortune to have this heartbreaking, life-changing event play out in the glare of a contentious election season. With illegal immigration a hot-button topic, and a crowded Republican presidential field competing to take the strongest stance on
that issue, Kate became a national symbol.
Steinle and Sullivan quickly realized they had gone from a family tragedy to a political talking point.
“For Donald Trump, we were just what he needed — beautiful girl, San Francisco, illegal immigrant, arrested a million times, a violent crime and yadda, yadda, yadda,” Sullivan said. “We were the perfect storm for that man.”
The national debate seemed a world away from their nice new house in Livermore, with its suburban vibe, sun-baked stucco bungalows and minivan moms. But they took a deep breath and dived into the fray. They had to take their narrative back.
“All of a sudden now we’re against sanctuary cities,” Steinle said. “Well, we never said that. What else are we going to get involved in?”
Sullivan went on Greta Van Susteren’s TV show and praised Hispanic families who are in this country without documentation. When someone else asked Steinle if he thought such people working in the Central Valley should be deported, he scoffed.
“If you deport them, what are you going to eat? Rocks?” he said. “I mean, they feed the United States.”
But there was no stopping the political whirlwind. It wasn’t just Fox News. They were called to Washington, D.C., to sit down with U.S. Sen. Dianne Feinstein, DCalifornia; Immigration and Customs Enforcement Director Sarah Saldaña; and both the Senate and House judiciary committees.
“Here I am, sitting in the same chair where John Dean gave testimony in the Watergate hearings,” Steinle said.
“At one point,” said Sullivan, “I said, ‘How did we get to Washington, D.C.? How did this happen?’ ”
And now they’re ready to step out of the spotlight. This, they said Wednesday, is their final media interview. They feel they’ve made their point — better controls on violent offenders in the country illegally are needed — and they’re ready to try to get their life back. It’s not going to be easy. Steinle still gets a catch in his throat when he describes the beautiful San Francisco day when he and a family friend drove to the city on a whim to meet Kate, a successful medical supply representative who lived near Mission Bay. They had some lunch, did a little shopping at the Ferry Building and then strolled out on the pier.
Kate took a selfie of herself and her dad, and the two had just turned to walk back when Steinle heard a pop.
“Kate kind of buckled and she said, ‘Help me, Dad,’ ” Steinle said. “She still had the cell phone up by her head and I thought, well maybe the cell phone blew up. I had no idea.”
He quickly realized there was something terribly wrong. Once he knew it was a gunshot wound, Steinle administered mouth-to-mouth resuscitation and, calling on his firstaid training, put Kate on her side so only one side of the body would fill with blood. But he says now, “It wouldn’t have mattered.”
Kate, their adventurous world traveler — Thailand, South Africa and Dubai — barely survived the trip to the hospital.
Steinle says he’s starting to pull out of the emotional free fall. He and Sullivan have even begun to joke a bit, with the familiarity of a couple in the 36th year of marriage.
“This is what makes it good, but strange,” Steinle said. “My daughter was just a person that got shot on a pier in San Francisco. And we get all the immigration stuff, but what is solace to us is that she has affected so many people.”
They’ve heard so many stories that they have taken to calling it “the Kate effect.” There’s the head surgery nurse she met through work who took an instant dislike to her, only to have Kate walk up, point at her, and say, “You and I are going to be friends.” And they were.
Expecting perhaps 200 to her funeral service, they scrambled to find room for over 1,000.
And they sift through the photos, keepsakes and cards from 32 years of a shared life.
“I was just reading a card that Kate wrote two years ago,” Sullivan said. “It said: A dad is someone who catches you when you fall and lifts you back up. Thank you for always being there for me.”
It’s gotten better, Steinle says, but he still goes to sleep with three words in his mind.
“Help me, Dad.”
“I said, ‘How did we get to Washington, D.C.? How did this happen?’ ” Liz Sullivan, Kate Steinle’s mother