Sex in San Francisco — from A to Z.
San Francisco has always been at the forefront of sexual liberation and a great setting for romance. As far back as the Gold Rush mining camps, locals were looking to strike it rich both in fortune and love. From the Barbary Coast to the Haight Ashbury,
Ais for adult content (which this guide has plenty of!)
B is for the old Barbary Coast, San Francisco’s red light district in the late 19th and early 20th centuries. Sexy saloon girls, gamblers and wild times were aplenty in this area that encompassed parts of present-day North Beach, Chinatown and Jackson Square. The area was named after the notorious pirate enclave in North Africa and can be followed today by sidewalk plaques noting the route of the Barbary Coast Trail.
C is for the “Cupid’s Span,” a sculpture of the winged one’s famous bow on the Embarcadero in Rincon Park by Claes Oldenburg and his wife, Coosje van Bruggen, a hot spot for engagement photos and seaside embraces. A tawdrier C is the Cable Car Nymphomaniac, Gloria Sykes, who suffered a head injury on a cable car in 1964 and claimed the accident led to her sex drive accellerating to the point where she took 300 lovers in five years. She later sued Muni for $500,000.
D is for 44D, Strip Queen Carol Doda’s famously enhanced cup size. Doda, who debuted her unclad bust at North Beach’s Condor Club, was a legendary San Francisco performer for more than five decades. She helped make Rudi Gernreich’s topless bathing suit famous, and in her later years opened a lingerie boutique. Doda died Nov. 9, 2015, at 78.
E is for the Exotic Erotic Ball, a exhibitionistic event where people dressed to indulge their fantasies. The first EEB was organized in 1979 by Perry Mann to raise campaign funds for his friend and business partner Louis Abolafia, who was running for president of the United States as a member of the Nudist Party. The ball was traditionally held the weekend before Halloween and included a burlesque show, a masquerade and an adult entertainment expo. The last ball was held in 2010.
F is for the Folsom Street Fair, where every leather lover and fetishist can find a friend (or more). The event was started in 1984 and is usually held the last Sunday in September on Folsom Street, between Eighth and 13th streets, and draws 400,000 visitors from around the globe. From BDSM to sports gear, furry mascot outfits to nothing at all, the fair runs the gamut from A to Z, just like this guide!
G is for gay mecca. San Francisco has a long history of libertine attitudes with the first gay bar, The Dash, established at 547 Pacific St. in 1908. It was a haven for soldiers discharged from the armed services in World War II for homosexuality, which helped the Castro evolve as a gay district, from which Harvey Milk became the city’s first gay supervisor.
H is for the Haight Ashbury, home of the Summer of Love that drew hippies from around the world in 1967. Today, the area is a tourist mecca with homages to Janis Joplin, the Grateful Dead and other ’60s rock ’n’ roll greats. The hippies came for the music but stayed for the free love.
I is for iambic pentameter, the meter in which Shakespeare wrote many of his sonnets, which you can read in the Shakespeare Garden at Golden Gate Park on a romantic afternoon. In honor of the bard, we doth not attempt his romantic meter here.
J is for Joltin’ Joe DiMaggio, a baseball legend and longtime San Franciscan. Off the field, DiMaggio was famous for his ultra-romantic Jan. 14, 1954, San Francisco City Hall elopement with Marilyn Monroe. Although Monroe filed for divorce 274 days into their tempestous marriage, the two remained lifelong friends and were rumored more than once to be considering remarriage. Monroe died in 1962; DiMaggio never remarried and had a half-dozen red roses delivered to her crypt three times a week for 20 years. When DiMaggio died in 1999. his final words were: “I’ll finally get to see Marilyn.”
K is for Kink.com, an adult film website that makes its home in the Mission’s historic Armory. Kink was originally based in New York but moved to San Francisco in 1998, because doesn’t everybody?
L is for the Lusty Lady, one of the first unionized peep shows in the U.S., located at 1033 Kearny St. Stripper Julia Query documented her co-workers’ protests, which led to the documentary film “Live Nude Girls Unite!” co-written and directed by Vicky Funari. The club closed in 2013.
M is for the Mitchell Brothers ( Jim and Artie), the infamous siblings who pioneered the porn and strip club scene in town, along with the theater that still bears their name at 895 O’Farrell St. In addition to directing the 1972 film “Behind the Green Door” (one of the first featurelength pornographic films), the brothers made the emporium an attraction for locals, tourists and even public officials — except for former Mayor Dianne Feinstein, who tried to close it down. The brothers became even more infamous when Jim shot and killed Artie in 1991, and the tragedy was turned into a made-for-television film starring brothers Charlie Sheen and Emilio Estevez.
N is for nudity. Is there anyplace in America where there’s more public nudity than San Francisco? You’ll see it at North Baker Beach, the corner of Castro and Market streets, the Folsom Fair, the Pride parade, the Dore Alley Fair and the Bay to Breakers footrace — with bystanders scarcely batting an eye. Nudity doesn’t always lead to love or sex, but it is emblematic of San Francisco’s live-and-let-live ethos.
O is for OneTaste, the female orgasmic meditation group that seeks better living through release. There’s a reason they call it “the big O.” Ohhhh, ohhh!
P is for polyamory, being in love or romantically involved with more than one person at the same time. The term polyamory was coined by the late Sonoma County neopagan priestess and author Morning Glory Zell-Ravenheart.
Q is for Carol Queen, co-founder of the Center for Sex and Culture and staff sexologist at Good Vibrations. Queen, who writes erotica, is also the author of the new “The Sex and Pleasure Book: Good Vibrations Guide to Great Sex for Everyone.” (See more on page 3.)
R is for romance, of which San Francisco has plenty! Even more than that, the city has been the setting for a number of romcoms (romantic comedies), including “The Woman in Red,” “So I Married an Axe Murderer,” “The Wedding Planner,” “Harold and Maude” and “The Bachelor” — in case your Valentine’s Day plan is “Netflix and chill.”
S is for Sally Stanford (a.k.a. Mabel Busby), the infamous “Lady of the House” who ran a bordello on Nob Hill and was later elected mayor of Sausalito. Dyan Cannon played Stanford in a madefor-TV movie.
T is for Tony Bennett, whose signature song “I Left My Heart in San Francisco,” was written for someone else in 1953. He first sang it at the Venetian Room at the Fairmont Hotel in 1961, and it has set a romantic mood ever since. Fairmont manager Tom Klein and City Protocol Chief Charlotte Shultz are raising funds to erect a statue of Bennett outside the hotel by August, timed to the crooner’s 90th birthday.
U is for underwear. There’s an Underwear Night every Thursday at SoMa leather bar Powerhouse, known as “Bulge.” From tighty-whities to boxers to thongs, there are undies for every taste. And let’s not forget Joe Boxer, the novelty boxer shorts company started here by entrepreneur Nicholas Graham in 1985, who named himself the chief underpants officer.
V is for “Vertigo,” the classic Alfred Hitchcock thriller with James Stewart and Kim Novak set in San Francisco. Fort Point, Muir Woods, 17-Mile Drive and the Mission San Juan Bautista are scenic backdrops for the tale of romantic obsession.
W is for 2004’s Winter of Love, when then-Mayor Gavin Newsom defied President George W. Bush’s policies and allowed gay couples to marry at City Hall in spite of its illegality then. The first of the 4,036 gay and lesbian couples who married were pioneering lesbian activists Phyllis Lyon and Del Martin.
X is for the XXXrated theaters in the Mid-Market area between Fifth and 10th streets, which sprang from defunct theaters built in the decades after the 1906 earthquake. Those buildings and others in the Tenderloin are being replaced by social media companies, residential projects and arts buildings like the American Conservatory Theater’s revamp of the 1917 Jewel Theater, now known as the Strand.
Y is for Yerba Buena Gardens, where you can canoodle on the grass (keep it PG in public, please!) or kiss under the spray of the Martin Luther King Jr. waterfall, where glass panels contain his quotations in the languages of San Francisco’s 13 sister cities, as well as African and Arabic dialects. There’s nothing more important than the international language of love.
Z is for Zuni Cafe, founded in 1979 and home to many a romantic dinner for two. Try oysters (20 varieties served) and pink bubbles on Valentine’s Day, a classic combination at a classic San Francisco restaurant.