San Francisco Chronicle

I’m anxious when I read news, guilty when I don’t

- By Jeanne Phillips Write to Dear Abby at P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069 or www.dearabby.com.

Dear Abby: Clearly, America is in a state of turmoil. I am horrified and ashamed of the senseless death occurring daily. I deal with anxiety, particular­ly regarding fear of death. As a result, the only thing I’ve found that I can do to cope with current events is to scan headlines, and ask my understand­ing husband for a synopsis of events that doesn’t include major triggers. However, I feel serious guilt that I may not be fully educating myself on recent events. Am I wrong to prioritize my mental well-being over the gravity of our country’s current situation? Serious Guilt Dear Serious Guilt: Wrong? Absolutely not! According to the Journal of the American Medical Associatio­n, 13 percent of Americans now use antidepres­sants to combat depression and anxiety. Our news media feed so many salacious details into our homes in the interest of high ratings that it’s a miracle the majority of Americans aren’t in need of medication. You are only protecting yourself, and that’s not wrong. It’s healthy. Dear Abby: I’m 23 and have been living with my boyfriend of almost two years. I love him dearly, but every time there’s an issue between us, it always becomes my fault, and I’m always the one to apologize. What should I do?

Inexperien­ced in Tampa Dear Inexperien­ced: You should not be forced into the role of perpetual peacekeepe­r by accepting the blame for everything. Suggest the two of you get couples counseling. However, if he refuses — and he may — you will then have to decide whether this is the way you want to spend the future, because things aren’t likely to change. Dear Abby: My sister-in-law “Dani” and my brother have been married almost three years. I recently discovered that Dani has created a fake social media page. She posted some nude photos on it and acts as if she’s single. I suspect she is getting paid to do live nude video chatting, too. I’m sure my brother would explode with rage and disappoint­ment if he knew. They have two small daughters, which leaves me to wonder if she has considered their embarrassm­ent if they ever find out. I really need your advice.

Shocked Sister-in-Law in the South Dear S-I-L: It’s time to talk to Dani. When you do, ask how she thinks your brother will react when he finds out — if he doesn’t already know — and how this could affect their daughters. This may be a fling, a way to prove to herself that she’s still attractive, or a way to earn needed money. But you will never know until you initiate a conversati­on with her.

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