I know all about my dad’s affair; what should I do?

Dear Abby: I’m 17 and the youngest in the family. My dad is cheating on my mom. My mom knows and has even told him she knows he’s having an affair. He didn’t apologize. His response was that he would still meet the other lady. For the past few months, Mom has been gathering evidence so she can divorce him. None of my other siblings know. I feel they should, but Mom doesn’t want them to. I am angry at my dad for making Mom suffer so much for so long. What should I do to help my mom, and should I tell my siblings? Dad Is Cheating Dear D.I.C.: You seem to have a great deal of insider knowledge about your parents’ marital difficulties, and it appears that has happened because your mother chose to confide in you. That’s a heavy burden for one so young to carry, and it wasn’t fair to you. Although you want to help your mother through this, I do not think you are equipped to do more than remain supportive and honor her request not to tell your siblings. Dear Abby: My daughter, “Jamie,” is in college, and has two roommates, one of whom is also her friend. Her friend knows a lot of people in this college town, and has much more of a social life than Jamie. Although Jamie always includes her friend in outings, her friend never returns the favor. Should I say something to her friend, in private, about how hurt my daughter’s feelings are?

Hurt Feelings Dear Hurt Feelings: No. The person to explain Jamie’s feelings to her roommate should be Jamie. Whether they can remain close friends under these circumstances is questionable, but for the next year they will have to coexist as roommates. Do not interfere. Dear Abby: I recently lost my mom to cancer, and my father has offered her engagement ring to me to propose to my longtime girlfriend. The ring used to belong to my grandmother and has a beautiful quality diamond in a yellow gold setting. My girlfriend and I are not fans of yellow gold. I was told the setting in Mom’s ring is badly worn and the stone is at risk of falling out. Would it be wrong to use the stone and have the “perfect” ring made for my future fiancee?

Nervous in New Jersey Dear Nervous: I don’t think it would be wrong. I do think you should talk to a trusted jeweler and take your guidance from him or her.