Hop on Lonzo Ball-UCLA bandwagon SCOTT OSTLER

I ain’t no March Madness expert, but ...

Go, Bruins! Got to root for Lonzo Ball and UCLA’s jailbreak offense (90.4 points per game). It’s college, these kids have the rest of their lives to be boring and regimented. Jerry Tarkanian tips his towel from heaven, even if it is to dreaded UCLA.

If you’re down on Lonzo because his dad is kind of full of himself, get over it. Lonzo seems real, and pop Ball talks a good game, but he backs it up. Or his kids do. (Lonzo has two high school brothers, Super and Wrecking.)

All the haters say Lonzo will get roughed up in the NBA because of his dad’s bombast. What, opposing teams are going to hire Tanya Harding?

With all the sexual abuse and academic fraud stories floating around the college sports world, our No. 1 worry is an overly enthusiastic father of talented hoopsters?

I root against any team whose coach’s budget for hair dye and/or wardrobe is bigger than the St. Mary’s recruiting budget. This is my Coach K Corollary.

Speaking of Coach K, enough already with the annual snit where you lock your players out of the fancy locker room and take away their Duke walkaround gear. In my brief, meager college hoops career, our locker room was so cramped and dark that the cockroaches walked on their hind legs and wore miner hats.

Stop all moralistic handwringing about the one-anddones. Ivan Rabb sticks around Cal an extra year, apparently for all the good reasons — to get better, to get smarter, to enjoy college — and it will cost him several million bucks.

If the NBA experts say you’re ready, you’re ready. You like college? Get drafted high in the first round, buy yourself a college.

When Spencer Haywood went to court in 1970 and killed the mandatory four-year stay for college athletes, coaches and experts predicted the death of college basketball. Not so far.

I’m also rooting for Oregon. It’s my mom’s team, and I don’t want Betty Lou to shoot out another TV screen. Go, Ducks.