Mom won’t let teen toss anything out
Dear Abby: I’ve been trying to get rid of things, but each time I do, my mother scolds me for getting rid of sentimental items and sends them back to my room. There are clothes that haven’t fit me for years, old trinkets, even gift boxes she won’t let me dispose of or donate. I would just take care of it myself, but she works from home and analyzes my every move. Additionally, I’ve discovered that she has boxes filled with every childhood toy and article of clothing I ever had. She intends to pass them on to me when I give birth to kids “in the next four years.” I’m only 19! Cluttered College Student in Wyoming Dear Cluttered: That your mother would set a deadline by which she expects you to have children is not only premature but, frankly, over the top. No one should decide that for you. You appear to have an unusually controlling mother. She may be sentimental about your things, or she may be a hoarder. By the age of 19, you should be mature enough to decide whether to keep items you no longer use. Tell your mom that you want to donate the items to people who actually need them. If that doesn’t sway her, suggest she store your unwanted things in her space because you need to declutter yours. If she refuses, it may be time to consider other living arrangements. Dear Abby: We are one of three couples who dine together at least once a week. We and one other couple are on a fixed income. The third couple is also retired, but have no money concerns. We like their company, but the wife is peculiar. She often hands strangers $50 bills when we’re at a restaurant, simply because she thinks they are “nice” or on a first date, etc. The other night we all had dinner together. When the server asked what she would like to drink, she inquired about how much the iced tea cost, and then said, “I’ll just have water!” ... We were so embarrassed we wanted to crawl under the table.
Frustrated in the Desert Dear Frustrated: Because the woman’s behavior makes you uncomfortable, perhaps you should dine with the couple less often. What she did should have had no effect on you because it was a reflection only on her. However, when someone is with friends who are on a fixed income and hands out $50 bills to perfect strangers — assuming “Lady Bountiful” hasn’t slipped a few cogs — the natural assumption is that she’s grandstanding.
Write to Dear Abby at P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069 or www.DearAbby.com.
Universal Press Syndicate