Writing therapeutic for actress Union
“How can you not root for the freaking Currys?” Gabrielle Union says.
The line comes in response to what should be a tough question, about how the actress reconciles growing up a Golden State Warriors fan and being married to Dwyane Wade, now a member of the team’s rival Cleveland Cavaliers. (Union and Cavaliers star LeBron James will also co-produce a forthcoming comedy series called “White Dave” for ABC, about an African American teen in a white suburb.)
But there’s no hesitation or mincing of words these days
from the star of BET’s “Being Mary Jane,” who grew up in Pleasanton.
Union has a new book, “We’re Going to Need More Wine: Stories That Are Funny, Complicated and True,” and a corresponding tour that has seen her speaking candidly about her past, including recent struggles to get pregnant, and a workplace rape in the 1990s. She comes to Commonwealth Club Inforum at the Marines’ Memorial Theater in San Francisco on Tuesday, Oct. 24.
The quasi-memoir was born out of writing assignments from Union’s therapist. As a result, it is raw, humorous, occasionally wrenching and frequently self-deprecating. Imagine if Judy Blume was writing her comingof-age books, except for people in their 30s and 40s.
“Luckily I kept everything I’ve ever written,” Union says. “They were never meant to be shared. It was literally for my own sanity and healing and peace of mind.”
Union had revealed the rape before, in an opinion piece for the Los Angeles Times, which was written in 2016 after revelations that “Birth of a Nation” director Nate Parker was accused of rape in the 1990s. She analyzes the attack much more in the book, including her thoughts about the rapist, whose gun she took and used. She shot at him and missed. He was later caught, convicted and is serving a long term in prison.
“People always ask, ‘Do you wish you’d had better aim?’ ” Union writes. “I mean, obviously you pull the trigger to stop, maim, or kill. That was my goal in that split second. But I don’t think I’m a killer. I don’t think I could live with killing anyone, even in self-defense. I think I would be even more tortured by that.”
The book jumps around her childhood and Hollywood life liberally — part memoir, part self-help book and often pure entertainment. The 44-year-old covers some obvious areas, like her breakout role as a cheerleader in “Bring It On.” Less obvious detours include a very funny chapter recounting her experience playing a Klingon in “Star Trek: Deep Space Nine.” There’s a lot about Wade too, including her co-parenting with his children, and their scheduled time together cuddled under a blanket watching TV’s “Nashville.”
Reading the book, it feels as if Union has lived at least three lives. But she insists she left a lot of great stories out, either because the content was too raw, or there wasn’t enough room.
This becomes apparent when Union retells a story about hanging out with Warriors point guard Stephen Curry and his wife Ayesha, before the pair were married.
“I was the jackass who was like, ‘Look you guys, you’re so young.’ ‘You guys should probably just see other people.’ ‘Realistically, is this going to work out?’ ” Union remembers, mocking herself a little more with each line. “We laugh about that now. They’re such good people.”
Union speaks like she writes in the book, easily shifting from humor to drama and the lessons she’s learned along the way.
After talking about the Currys, she recalls one of her first-ever celebrity encounters, seeing Golden State Warriors legend Chris Mullin shooting baskets at a park in San Ramon when she was still in high school. She remembers intentionally leaving him alone. He later walked over and thanked Union and her friends for letting him work out.
“That’s still how I treat people that I respect. I give them their space. I watch them from afar and I just appreciate their greatness,” Union says. “He gave us that little bit of something. That to me was awesome. I’ve kind of held that in back of my mind.”
Her chat with The Chronicle was several days before Miramax mogul Harvey Weinstein was accused of rape and fired from his own company, so if the topic comes up at the Commonwealth Club, expect a thoughtful and candid answer. Union the actress could be guarded in some interviews, but Union the author seems to shine brightest when faced with uncomfortable questions.
It was, however, a day after a People magazine story came out that hyper-focuses on the chapter of the book about her multiple miscarriages and struggles with in vitro fertilization. She is content that her story might have helped a few people, even though the piece ignored 95 percent of the content of the book.
“That was our big fear,” she says.
But she quickly checks herself, remembering all the other women with IVF struggles who thanked her for writing about the experience.
“I’m OK to be that person if that’s what it takes,” Union says. “I just want to give a sense of community. A sense of connectivity, and maybe a little hope.”
“Luckily everythingI keptI’ve ever written. They were never meant to be shared. It was literally for my own sanity and healing.” Gabrielle Union
Peter Hartlaub is The San Francisco Chronicle’s pop culture critic. Email: phartlaub@sfchronicle.com Twitter: @PeterHartlaub