San Francisco Chronicle

Food gifts turn pregnant woman green

- By Jeanne Phillips

Dear Abby: I am pregnant. Because of this, my father-inlaw has started to dote on me, especially with food. He says cooking is his passion, but he’s a horrible cook. Every time he shows up, he brings something he spent hours making and I feel obligated to eat.

My husband stepped in briefly when his father kept making me spinach quiche. After one slice I got sick. My FIL kept bringing more quiche over until my husband told him it was one of my trigger foods for nausea.

The thing is, all of his cooking triggers my nausea. How can I get my FIL to back off ? It was bad enough eating his food before I was pregnant, but I can no longer stand it.

Nauseated in the East Dear Nauseated: It’s time for you to speak up for yourself. Tell your father-in-law you appreciate his trying to nurture you, but that in your present condition you cannot eat any of it because of the violent nausea it brings on. Many women share your problem during pregnancy. When the baby arrives, tell him you will remain on a restricted diet as long as you are nursing. Surely you are aware that women have been known to nurse their little ones for years. Once your child is ready to enter preschool, if your FIL is still trying to bring food over, tell him thank you but please stop cooking for you because your palate and his are just too different. It’s the truth.

Dear Abby: My mom recently moved from her home to a memory care facility. While she has no short-term memory left, she’s happy and lightheart­ed, and remembers her life and friends well. I want to send a short change-of-address note to people across the country whom my mom has known for the past 70 years to let them know how to reach her, or that they can drop by if they are in her city. I’m having trouble deciding how much to say and what is appropriat­e.

Needs Guidance Dear Needs Guidance: Consider wording your message like this: “I’m writing to let you know that Mom is no longer living in her house on Summervill­e Place. She recently moved to an assisted living facility called Memory Lane. Her address is _____________________________, and her phone number is ___-___-____. She is happy and lightheart­ed and remembers you all with great affection. If you are passing through her city, feel free to drop by and visit. I know she would love to see you and reminisce.”

Write to Dear Abby at P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069 or www.DearAbby.com.

Universal Press Syndicate

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