Interruptions of doorbell stress out telecommuter
Dear Miss Manners: As people are now telecommuting to work, as I do, how does one avoid unwanted people at one’s door?
In my job, I have to use extreme concentration and I feel that I should not be interrupted in the privacy of my own home. I had a custom sign made and posted on my door that says, “By Appointment Only; Absolutely No Soliciting.” That was the most polite thing I could come up with.
In my job, I can lose many thousands of dollars if an important call is interrupted by the door, so I get quite stressed. “No trespassing” signs don’t help, either. I can’t ignore the doorbell for wondering if it’s an emergency. I would enclose the entire yard with a locked fence, except I have to have deliveries made. How would you handle this? Gentle Reader: By first taking a deep breath. As a longtime telecommuter, Miss Manners is sympathetic to your problem. But if you commonly have emergencies that show up at your doorstep, she wonders what you did before you worked at home.
Now, at least, you can smell or hear when the house catches fire, something that was probably not possible in the office. A work space out of visual sight of the front door, and a quiet doorbell, should solve your problem. Dear Miss Manners: An organization I am part of raises funds for scholarships and awards for students in the local school district. In 32 years, we have given more than $500,000 to students.
About six years ago, I noticed that the organization no longer received a thank-you in any form — written, emailed or text — for the scholarships or awards from any student. Many members of my committee tell me that thanking anyone for a gift is no longer something students do.
I am wondering if it would be proper to remind the students that thanking people for their gifts is still in vogue. Or would that be considered tacky in today’s society?
Gentle Reader: Expecting thanks for a favor bestowed is never unreasonable, or subject to fashion, whether or not it is commonly given. The questions, then, are: (1.) To whom thanks should be addressed, and (2.) How to change students’ behavior without being rude.
One thanks a person, which in a corporate setting would generally mean the boss. But charities have donors, to whom the students can be asked to write. By giving the students a specific donor to thank, you will benefit the institution, improve the recipients’ manners — and avoid the ban against demanding your own thanks.
Dear Miss Manners: How should I respond to co-workers who wear earbuds? I start talking to them without realizing they have these gadgets plugged into their ears. They miss half of what I am saying, and then I have to repeat myself.
Gentle Reader: These co-workers should convey a signal (pointing to their ears, half-embarrassed, half-apologetic) so that unsuspecting conversationalists are forewarned.
In lieu of that, Miss Manners suggests that you make up your own system of sign language as you approach them (one arm outstretched in questioning mode, one finger pointing to your mouth) so that you are not continually forced to repeat yourself. It would also not be remiss for you to start going to someone else with any important issues, so as to discourage any non-workrelated earbud activity.
Send questions to Miss Manners’ website: www.missmanners.com; to her email address: dearmiss manners@gmail.com; or through postal mail: Miss Manners, Universal Uclick, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.