Tired of getting junk as handmedown gifts

Dear Miss Manners: My husband and I are expecting our first child, and we have been gifted tons of handmedowns from friends and family. Some of these items are great, and we are grateful for them.

Several family members, however, seem to think that they can just use us as a dumping ground for old, dirty, broken or unsafe items they no longer want. We’ve received a broken playpen, a moldy booster seat, a ripped baby carrier from the 1970s, and towels that are old and rough.

We’ve accepted everything with thankyous and smiles, but now the burden is on us to sort through the trash and get rid of it. At a time when we are already overwhelmed, this is incredibly frustrating.

While it’s not worth starting an argument with our family members, I’m hoping you’ll consider publishing this as a public service announcement to givers. If you want to hand down baby items, please make sure they are in good, safe, working condition, and check with the parent(s) to ask if it’s something they still need.

Gentle Reader: Consider the announcement made. Miss Manners is sympathetic to your situation and commends you for enduring it. She humbly reminds you, however, that what you consider a threadbare and smelly old blanket may be, for others, a treasured memory they are now lovingly passing down to you. Dear Miss Manners: On what occasion would you cover your plate with your napkin? If you don’t finish your meal and want to shield your guests from seeing it? When you finish? Gentle Reader: Never?