Girl was ‘muy gorda, muy bonita’

Grampo, grama y Canutito had all finished eating dinner so después de la cena, they were sitting en la cocina. Grampo Caralampio y Grama Cuca were busy hablando de todo lo que pasó ese día but Canutito just sat there mirando; staring blankly a la pared. Grampo nudged grama por debajo de la mesa and pointed quietly in the direction of Canutito con sus lips.

Grama Cuca looked up y le preguntó: “¿Qué te pasa, m’hijo? ¿Por qué estás tan quiet?”

“Grama,” Canutito said slowly, I don’t understand muncho about las muchitas. Can you tell algo about girls? Yo no sé nada de ellas.

“Uh, m’hijo,” grampo chimed in, “¿Qué cosa quieres saber about girls? I used to be un experto de ellas antes de casarme, pero now that I am married, Yo pienso que I may be losing my touch.”

“I want to know por qué una muchita bonita can be called una ‘fox’ pero una muchita fiera would be called una ‘perra’.”

“I don’t quite understand lo que estás preguntando, m’hijo,” grama said.

“Lo que yo entiendo, grama,” Canutito replied, “es que both un fox yun dog son animales más o menos about the same size y los dos son furry, little creatures so entonces, ¿por qué es que uno refers to a pretty girl y el otro hace refer to a homely girl?”

“Probablemente porque un fox tiene un color bien bonito whereas el perro puede ser cualquier mutt off the street,” grampo said.

Grama Cuca jumped in ahora con su comentario: “M’hijo,” she said, “en mi tiempo, girls were not compared to zorras ni perras; in my day, they were compared a marranitas.”

“How sad, grama,” Canutito said. “Why would people compare a la muchitas to little piggies?”

“Es porque in the olden days cuando una muchita estaba chubby or plump, el proverbio es que estaba muy gordita; muy bonita,” grama replied.

“En esos, días, m’hijo,” grampo said, “to be fat or chubby era una good thing porque indicaba que you were healthy o hasta rich.”

“The saying used to be, m’hijo,” grama added, “was que una pretty girl ‘estaba tan bonita que estaba echando pellas’.”

“She was so pretty that she was oozing beauty balls through her skin,” Canutito translated. “Pero, ¿what does todo eso mean?” he asked. “I don’t know lo qué son ‘pellas’.”

“Pellas,” grama said, “son bolitas de manteca under the skin of a pig. When there is a lot of lard en los sides del marrano, that is called: ‘la lonja’.”

I know que si una muchacha was made de chicharrones,” grampo chimed in, “I would be la primera persona to lamberle las manos.”

“Eso no es so far-fetched,” Grama Cuca said. “When I was a little girl, no teníamos hair tonic pa’l untarnos en el cabello. Mi mamá used to rub manteca de marrano through our hair.

So did everybody en la escuela run around smelling como chicharrones or bacon, grama?” Canutito teased. “Only en los warm days, m’hijo,” Grama Cuca said. “Eso es cómo I fell in love con tu grama, m’hijo,” grampo said. “Un día calentito, I walked into el cuarto en la escuela where she was and I could smell chicharrones wafting por todo el cuarto. I could tell que ese olor delicioso was coming de tu grama. It was como si ella estaba sweating pellas de mantequita. I picked up una piece of tortilla and I went and wiped esa tortilla on her forehead. I ate it y de una vez I knew que I was in love.” Canutito just shook his head pa’ cada lão .He liked living in a time donde pellas de manteca no hacían determine cual muchita era la más bonita.