China’s seniors looking for love
BEIJING — Zhao Lin had become accustomed to the single life. But his days and nights were growing lonely, and he decided it was time to find Ms. Right.
That’s how the 78-year-old ended up at the park.
“I have been looking for more than a year,” said Zhao, a fixture at one of the dozens of senior singles scenes popping up in public parks around China. So far, he admits, the pickings have been slim.
“It’s usually one conversation and that’s it,” said Zhao, a widower since 1971, in a lament familiar to frustrated singles no matter their age. “There’s no second time. They’ll let you down and there’s no hope. So what’s the point?”
Three decades of economic growth and social change have transformed attitudes of love and sex among China’s elderly. Increasingly single and assertive, the country’s lonely seniors are on the market.
In Chinese media, the phenomenon has been labeled “twilight love.” Contestants well into their later years now make regular appearances on Chinese dating shows with names like Peach Blossoms Bloom, Exciting Old Friends and Holding Hands. Online chat rooms have emerged for older singles.
But in China, none of those venues holds the same appeal as the local park.
In Beijing, the elderly have picked Changpuhe and the Temple of Heaven. The southwestern municipality of Chongqing has a “matchmaking corner” in Hongyadong Park. In the northern city of Xian, elderly residents gather every Wednesday and Saturday at Revolution Park.
“My American colleagues, when they go to China, they are amazed at how many people are socializing in a park,” said Bei Wu, director of global health and aging research at New York University, who has studied China’s elderly for 30 years.
“It’s a practical way for a group gathering,” Wu said. “In the park, you can increase the chance of having successful blind dates.” Demographics is behind it all. An aging population means more people are outliving their spouses. The number of widows and widowers totals nearly 48 million, according to a study by the government research group Chinese Academy of Social Sciences. The group projects that number will rise to 118.4 million by 2050.
And 4 out of 5 widows and widowers want to remarry, according to the People’s Daily, the official newspaper of the Chinese Communist Party, citing a survey by Chinese Academy of Sciences.
Others are choosing to leave their spouses. In Beijing, nearly one-third of divorce cases were filed by people age 60 to 70, according to the Beijing Evening News.
The growing population of elderly singles has public health implications. HIV infection rates are rising among elderly Chinese because many do not practice safe sex, according to the Chinese Center for Disease Control and Prevention. Cases among Chinese men aged 60 and older have nearly tripled since 2012, it said.
But Zhao said he still longed for a mate to ward off his loneliness. “It gets miserable,” he said.
Zhao talked about “three treasures in this life” — to have someone know when “you’re cold or warm, in pain or in despair.”