Santa Fe’s sex-ed deficit

Teens and others say current programs built around abstinence-only curriculum can do more harm than good

The birds and the bees, condoms on bananas, the gym teacher who may or may not be qualified to teach teenagers about their bodies, the quiet snickering and raised eyebrows of pubescent children, chastity rings and virginity marbles.

For many young people, these are the tropes of sexual education.

Currently, New Mexico mandates that schools teach a course in health education, including instruction on HIV and how to avoid sexually transmitted diseases, stressing abstinence.

While many teens in Santa Fe say they’ve benefited from learning about sex via school counselors and in-class programs, others say say they resent abstinence-only curriculum and a lack of education regarding same-sex intercourse.

Robert Benon, the certified nurse practitioner at Santa Fe High School’s Teen Health Center, said abstinence-only sex education was implemented by the government in the late 1980s to early 1990s to combat concerning rates of teen pregnancy.

But instead of deterring kids from having sex, the strategy had the opposite effect: “It’s almost as if, in a country like ours where we say, ‘Don’t do it, it’s wrong,’ it makes [teens] more likely to do it,” he said.

Persephone Wilson of Planned Parenthood of Santa Fe agreed that abstinence-only is not only an unrealistic approach, but it does a disservice to youth.

“Abstinence-only education can, in fact, do more harm than good,” she said.

She points out that around 50 percent of teens are having sex during their high school years, and an abstinence-only approach to sex ed deprives them of the information they need to keep themselves safe and prevent unplanned pregnancy. Additionally, she said, these programs can be “notorious for using shame as a strategy to prevent teens from having sex, which can be incredibly harmful to young people’s self-esteem.”

A 2016 study from the University of New Mexico that surveyed college students on their satisfaction with high school sex ed concluded that students who received comprehensive education “were more likely to report that their education helped them to make decisions about sexual debut, to prevent pregnancy and to prevent sexually transmitted infections.”

Benon said he wishes it were more common to see Western Europe’s approach to the issue, which essentially says, “‘Sex is beautiful. When people love each other, sometimes they have sex and it’s a wonderful, wonderful part of life, and someday I know you are going to do it, and that’s going to be up to you when, and when that time comes, here is how not to get pregnant, here’s how to not get STDs.’ ”

Girls Inc., a nonprofit serving about 1,200 girls ages 5 to 18, teaches a sex-ed curriculum that mirrors many of these values. Madonna Hernandez, the director of programs for Girls Inc., said that although the organization’s mission is to “empower all girls to be strong, smart and bold,” what that really means is to be healthy, educated and independent.

“If you think about those three words … those fall very much in line with health and sexuality,” she said.

This is why organizers of Girls Inc. offer a comprehensive education about sex and sexuality from the start. Five-year-olds in the program delve into the systems of the body by doing “surgery” on anatomically correct dolls. When the girls are a few years older, the focus shifts to the reproductive system, and they create puppets that are visually representative of the changes experienced during puberty. This culminates in a weekend intensive with the girls and their guardians, helping daughters and parents learn how to build relationships in which the girls feel comfortable talking about puberty and eventually sex.

Hernandez said in this way, Girls Inc. tries to “make sure they are able to advocate for themselves … and to know exactly what’s going on because knowledge is power.”

Ayla Taylor, a sophomore at Santa Fe Prep, agreed, stressing the importance of communication in sexual relationships. She advises to “communicate really well for what’s good and bad,” and added that constructive criticism has the potential to “benefit both of you.”

While Wilson said Planned Parenthood hopes these conversations are starting at home, “We know not everyone is comfortable talking about sex and sexuality, so having access to medically accurate sex education in school settings can ensure that every kid gets the information they need to make safe, healthy decisions around sex and sexuality.”

This growing openness with sexuality is reflected by today’s popular culture. Netflix’s documentary series, Sex Explained, goes into depth about the truth of sexual fetishes, contraceptives, fertility and birth. The streaming platform’s own Sex Education follows a student whose mother is a sexual therapist as he navigates his own sex life in high school and offers to help and advise his peers through their own sexual endeavors.

Both shows also provide information and representation for LGBT and ethnic communities. Yet, in mainstream sex ed, there often remains a deficit of information for nonbinary and queer teens.

“There’s no talk about different bodies, especially trans and nonbinary bodies, in terms of anatomy,” said Pico Dilla, an organizer for

the Albuquerque Queer Resistance Collective. “Also, there’s a lack of inclusion of what happens to your body when people choose to go through hormonal replacement therapy.”

Dilla, who also works at UNM’s LGBTQ Resource Center, said adequate sexual education for the queer community is a must; otherwise, “not a lot of people have access to [it].”

Until New Mexico implements information about queer sex and offers alternatives to abstinence-only education, Dilla said, the current state of sexual education is inadequate.

Sophia Wroblewski, a senior at St. Michael’s High School, which is obligated by Catholic doctrines to solely teach abstinence-only sex ed, agreed, noting that despite the school’s acceptance of different sexualities, there remains a lack of conversation that leaves queer teens to their own devices.

“Being gay … I had to experience [being with a girl] to know anything,” Wroblewski said.

Perhaps part of the silence stems from the fact New Mexico is considered “neutral” in its efforts to include LGBTQ communities in sex-ed instruction, according to the Guttmacher Institute.

This lack of education is not only isolating — it is dangerous.

According to the U.S. Centers for Disease and Control and Prevention, “LGB youth are at greater risk for depression, suicide, substance use and sexual behaviors that can place them at increased risk for HIV and other sexually transmitted diseases.”

“You need to be just as careful when you’re gay,” Wroblewski said of safe sex and the dangers of sexually transmitted diseases. “When people think just because there’s not a guy involved, especially with lesbians, that you’re golden, you’re going to be fine no matter what. … That’s not necessarily true.”

Yet with an abstinence sex-ed curriculum, Wroblewski said, it can be difficult for LGBT youth to know they should take precautions. Equally concerning, it can be nearly impossible for them to fully understand their own sex lives.

“They feel like they can’t educate themselves,” she said, “because it’s gross even though it’s accepted.”